


THE WALKING DEAD: If I Should Fall From Grace With God, A Hilltop Christmas

by D_J_Marlowe



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Christmas, Hilltop Colony, M/M, Redemption, hating the holidays
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-19
Updated: 2017-12-19
Packaged: 2019-02-14 18:02:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 27,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13013208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/D_J_Marlowe/pseuds/D_J_Marlowe
Summary: Christmas has not been celebrated since the world fell to the walkers. No one has had the time with fighting the walkers and fighting people who are still bound and determined to destroy each other. Maggie, the leader of Hilltop, wants to celebrate in order to bring peace and unity to the fractured community after the war with the Saviors. With the refugees from the lost Alexandria and The Kingdom, she may be able to pull it off. But can the people forgive someone who is highly regarded and has returned from a self-imposed exile? Is the Christmas spirit still alive in the world of the dead? In the midst of all of this, love is found and may save the man in question from his own destruction.





	THE WALKING DEAD: If I Should Fall From Grace With God, A Hilltop Christmas

**ACT 1**

 

       The lone rider on the motorcycle sped down the road unsure of his destination that day. He was hungry so perhaps food would have to be Daryl Dixon`s priority as his eyes scanned the trees of the woods on each side, hoping for a quick and easy target like a deer or small bear. Daryl had never eaten bear meat but he was willing to try anything at this point. When he saw movements in the trees he thought it could be his meal for the day, but most likely it was walkers. Above the sound of the motor he thought he heard a gunshot but before he could process the information the bullet hit one of his tires causing him to skip over a pothole he was about to drive around and both cycle and rider skidded to the side of the road. Daryl hit his head hard enough on the pavement to cause considerable pain but not unconsciousness. Rider and motorcycle now lay in a heap as Daryl assessed his condition. No broken bones, but his arm bled slightly and his shoulder hurt from where he twisted it as he tried to break his fall. Slowly he got up, holding his head as images spun in circles. Someone from the trees had shot at him, but he could see no one. Daryl would have to try and find and kill them. His crossbow had been thrown a few feet away so he slowly made his way over to it and picked it up.

       Daryl was now alone in the world with no place to call home. He told himself he could and would survive, but being away from those he had felt was his family was slowly taking its toll on his self-esteem and confidence. Any hopes and dreams he had were no longer a part of him, living like a rabid wild animal and even looking the part after leaving Hilltop in disgrace. Would redemption ever be possible for Daryl Dixon? He heard the growling of a walker and easily shot it down as he made his way towards a set of railroad tracks that paralleled the road.

                                                                      *****

       Paul 'Jesus' Rovia was sprawled across the railroad tracks, his head a myriad of pain and muddled confusion as waves of dizziness turned in a strange carousel of trying to figure out what had actually happened to him. He vaguely remembered seeing a figure come out of the forest and as he turned to fight the person off, someone else had bashed him in the head with a pipe. He could still feel the dried blood on the area of impact on the back of his head. Foremost on his mind was the need to get back to Hilltop and bring the medicine he had found that was so desperately needed. He made one attempt at sitting up and as he did so he saw the shadow of someone approaching him before he passed out.

       "Paul?" he heard a familiar voice call just as he lost consciousness.

       The filthy and completely disheveled Daryl Dixon bent down over the now unconscious Jesus. As he bled his breath came in short bursts as he tried to keep his spinning head steady. Why was Jesus alone and unconscious? Since Daryl wasn`t in the best of shape himself he wasn`t sure what to do. His arm and shoulder hurt and there was a large black and blue lump near his hairline where he had struck the pavement. Daryl had been out on his own for over four months. He knew he had made decisions that resulted in some unfortunate consequences and felt that many people were still angry with him, maybe even Rick.

       "Paul, come on. Wake up," Daryl said as he gently tried to bring Jesus around. "Can you hear me?"

       Jesus did not stir or open his eyes. A not quite freezing wind blew around them, reminding Daryl that winter had set in. It was a mild day, but he knew the snows would be arriving soon, however not soon enough to freeze the walkers just yet since Daryl heard the sounds he always dreaded to hear--a group of them, about thirty or forty, was approaching.

       "Gotta get you out of here," Daryl said as he picked up his crossbow and slung it over his chest. He then carefully lifted Jesus up and draped him over his back and began moving at a fast pace in order to stay ahead of the walkers. Hilltop was a two-mile hike and he had no idea about the terrain in this part of the woods, but Daryl was used to that kind of thing. He would have to fight off the dizzy spells to the best of his ability and move quickly.

                                                                    *****

       Maggie watched as Siddiq worked on Jesus`s injuries in the medical trailer. "How long will he take to recover?" The concern in her voice could not be ignored.

       "Two, maybe three days," Siddiq said. "He has a mild concussion."

       "I told him not to go out on this run alone." Maggie turned to look at Daryl. "And where the hell have you been the past four months? You look like you`ve been living like an animal. I hope you are finished going off half-cocked." Maggie glared at him in disgust.

       Daryl seemed to shrink at her tone and turned away from her. No one was more disgusted at him than himself in that moment. "I know." He slumped down in a nearby chair and buried his head in his hands.

       Maggie stood there and continued to stare at him a little longer before she came over and placed a hand on his shoulder. Daryl didn`t look up, unable to face anyone`s scrutiny. "Where did you find Jesus?" she asked quietly.

       "The railroad tracks a couple miles from here. Don`t know what happened." Daryl looked up at her before looking away.

       "There have been reports of former Saviors out there roaming around as marauders. He may have been attacked by them." Maggie studied Daryl closely. "You don`t look in too good of a shape yourself. Your head is bleeding and you keep holding up your arm."

       "Someone shot at my bike when I tried to avoid a pothole. The bike`s a mess on the side of the road. I tired to find who shot at me. That`s when I found him." He glanced at Jesus who was now getting his head bandaged. Jesus`s eyes were open as he came back to consciousness.

       "Looks like you were in quite a fight," Siddiq said to Jesus.

       "No fight. Someone sneaked up behind me and hit me with a metal pipe--I think. How did I get here?" a groggy Jesus asked.

       "Daryl found you and brought you here," Maggie said. "They didn`t hang around long enough to take your knives or backpack. They`re over here on the table."

       Daryl tried to stand and felt his head start to spin. He would have fallen onto the floor if Siddiq hadn`t caught him in time. He felt Daryl`s head. "Looks like Jesus isn`t the only one with a concussion. Let`s take off your jacket and shirt and take a look at that arm and shoulder." Maggie helped Siddiq prop Daryl back in the chair.

       "I`m fine," Daryl said feeling woozy.

       "You`re not fine," Maggie said. "You need to stay here and clean up until you heal. You hear me?"

       Daryl nodded quietly.

       "You might go get Bertie to help me," Siddiq said. He glanced at Jesus. "You lie still for a while. I`ll be in the exam room with this one." He then helped Daryl to his feet and supported him as they left the room.

                                                                    *****

       Later that day Siddiq leaned over Jesus as he flicked a pen light back and forth in his eyes. "Pupil response is good." Jesus tried to sit up but Siddiq shoved him back down. "Both you and Daryl are pretty banged up."

       "I can`t believe Daryl brought me all the way back," Jesus said.

       "It`s a wonder he didn`t pass out along the way. Are you in any pain?"

       "My head hurts."

       "You are not to go on any more runs until you`ve recovered. Maggie`s orders and mine." Siddiq looked up when he heard the sound of footsteps. "I thought I told you to stay put."

       "I heard voices," Daryl said as he propped himself against the door frame.

       Eduardo entered carrying some clean clothes and towels. "I take it someone needs a bath," he said.

       Siddiq pointed to Daryl who still looked like he belonged in a zoo. Jesus looked at him and grinned. "Dirty Daryl, living up to his reputation."

       "Shut up."

        Jesus only laughed. "It`s good to see you anyway. Looks like we`re stuck with you for a while." There was a little smile on his face.

        "Looks that way don`t it." Daryl knew Jesus was just teasing him and somewhat enjoyed it.

        Eduardo came up beside Daryl and supported him as they turned around. Daryl`s and Jesus`s eyes met and lingered for a moment.

        Bertie entered the trailer carrying some bandages. She handed them to Siddiq and looked at Jesus. "Maggie said you were back." She then looked at Daryl with an expression of contempt. "People are talking about you, too."

        "What kind of talk?" Daryl asked, his tone harsh.

        "That you`re mostly crazy. That you don`t belong here and should leave."

        Daryl wanted to charge Bertie but Siddiq and Eduardo stopped him. He shoved them aside, but his head started to spin and he fell, hitting it on the side of the table.

        "Oh hell," Siddiq said as he bent over him.

        Daryl sat on the floor his breathing heavy as he grasped the leg of the table. "I gonna kill the next asshole that calls me crazy."

        "Calm the hell down," Siddiq said. "Relax. Slow down. They`re just blowing off steam."

        Daryl slowly crawled onto the chair, his head now throbbing due to the new injury. "Damn, everythin` feels weird."

        "It`s the injuries to your head you`ve sustained," Siddiq said. "You`re not going anywhere if I can help it."

        Jesus looked over at Daryl wishing he could comfort the big redneck. He had heard the talk from the others that Daryl had completely lost it and gone insane. That`s why he did what he did. That`s why he disappeared without a trace. Deep inside Jesus hadn`t believed it for a moment. He knew the Daryl Dixon he had encountered when he first met him was still there.

        "I found some of Freddie`s clothes that we put in storage. They should fit you alright." Eduardo gently helped Daryl to his feet and escorted him to the back, closing the door behind them.

        "I`m not a psychologist by any means," Siddiq said as he helped Jesus to sit up and get out of the bed. "Daryl has not processed all that has happened to him since that night with Negan in the woods. It`s why he reacted so negatively to those Savior refugees that wanted to join Hilltop. Think you can stand up?"

        "Yeah," Jesus said. "I`ll go to my trailer and lie down for a while." He glanced at the closed door then at Bertie. "People need to stop calling him insane to his face or behind his back."

        "You`re awful defensive about him," Bertie said.

        "He needs a lot of understanding. Hell, we all made mistakes, including me. Daryl can`t forgive himself for his own." Jesus adjusted his clothing and picked up his knives.

        Bertie looked down for a moment as if ashamed of what she had been thinking. "Maybe you`re right, Jesus. Maybe no one is beyond redemption. But what he did was wrong."

        "Yes, it was. Anyone can do anything in the heat of the moment. Daryl`s not known for his control is he? A troubled mind can do some awful things. That doesn`t mean he`s a bad person." Without another word Jesus left.

                                                                      *****

        "He showed up yesterday carrying Jesus on his back. He looked terrible, like he`s been living like an animal," Maggie said to Rick in her office that next day. "People are saying he`s completely out of his mind."

        "Daryl`s the type that shouldn`t have been fighting a war. Any war," Rick said with a heavy look of concern.

        "I don`t think I should let him stay here. He`s too erratic and easily provoked." Maggie sighed hoping she was making the right decision. "He might still be a danger to everyone. I do think he feels guilty for what he did."

        "There`s a part of me that knows he can get right in his head again, Maggie. He pulled away from me the night that incident occurred. He pulled away from everyone. I have to believe there is someone who can pull him back." Rick`s voice was deep with the concern and care for the man he still felt was his brother.

        A cold wind rattled the shutters of the windows behind Maggie. "Feels like winter`s here with a bang. It was so mild yesterday."

        Rick had a faraway look on his face when he got up and glanced out the window. "Do you think I should go see him?"

        "He may not want to see you."

        "I thought about that." The wind rattled the window again. "I hate the thought of turning Daryl out in the dead of winter. He`s from Georgia like us, not used to winter survival. There`s a good chance he wouldn`t make it."

        "I never considered that. But what if he goes off again? I can`t take that chance, either."

        Rick`s mood became more pensive. "He`s still my brother, Maggie. I watched one brother go off the deep end and that didn`t end well. I don`t want to see another." Rick turned to leave. "I`ll respect whatever decision you make."

                                                                    *****

        "I`ve decided to go ahead with that Christmas celebration. I`ve got everybody rummaging through every storage space around here, especially the attic," Jesus overheard Maggie say, her voice echoing in the foyer as she and Michonne talked by the staircase that next morning.

        "Good morning, ladies," he said smiling.

        "Are you sure you`re supposed to be up?" Michonne asked.

        "I feel fine. Just a slight headache. I just got back from seeing Siddiq. He tells me as soon as Daryl is well you`re going to send him away from Hilltop."

        "Yes, that`s right," Maggie said. "I can`t take the risk of a repeat."

        "I understand your concern. I don`t believe he`s completely lost to us. Just to himself," Jesus said. He knew he couldn`t let Daryl go out in disgrace again.

        "There are children here, Jesus."

        "None that he`s ever threatened." Jesus looked at Michonne. "Has he ever endangered Judith?"

        "No. He`s always protected her," Michonne replied.

        "That`s why I think he did what he did. It was to protect Judith and all the other children. Those Savior refugees wanted to kidnap several of them, remember?" Jesus rubbed his forehead in frustration wishing his headache would go away. "However, I doubt anything I say will change your mind."

        "Why are you so adamant that he stay here?" Maggie asked.

        Jesus was hesitant as he replied. "Because he deserves a second chance. I don`t give up as easily as some do. I`m going to the kitchen to see if Ms. Maitlin`s tea can settle my head." He left them not wanting to discuss things further.

        Maggie looked at Michonne a somewhat astonished look on her face. "What do you think I should do? I`m asking because everyone seems to have an opinion on Daryl."

        Michonne laughed. "Why should my opinion matter one way or the other?" She nodded her head in the direction Jesus had gone. "I think there`s something more going on. He was on Daryl`s side four months ago."

        "He was wasn`t he? Come to think of it I`ve never heard him put Daryl down in front of others." Maggie sighed. "Maybe I`m being hasty in my decision. I`ll mull it over some more. Now, are you going to help me rummage through the upstairs storerooms or not?"

        "I`m helping against my better judgement," Michonne said the not-so-sure tone evident in her voice.

                                                                     *****

Siddiq was not around when Rick came over to the medical trailer and found Rosita tending to Daryl in the infirmary. She held up her finger to her lips. Daryl was obviously fast asleep.

        "How is he?" Rick asked quietly.

        Rosita reached up and adjusted the flow of the IV. "With some rest he should recover. Siddiq says he has a concussion, injuries to his arm and shoulder from the accident. He`s also malnourished and has acute exhaustion," Rosita replied.

        Rick sat down heavily in an empty chair. "To be honest I thought we`d never see him again. I could understand Maggie`s anger at the time and how the people felt they were unsafe, but I know Daryl."

        "We all understood," Rosita said. She lifted up Daryl`s wrist and took his pulse. "Convincing the people of Hilltop and The Kingdom of that? That`s what was impossible."

        "I know he overreacts at times and that`s all it was."

        Daryl took a deep breath and opened his eyes. He looked up and saw Rosita smiling at him. "You`ve been asleep for over ten hours," she said. "Hungry?"

        "Yeah," Daryl said softly.

        "I`ll bring you a tray. I`m sure Ms. Maitlin has something good today. You have a visitor." Rosita nodded towards Rick as she left the room.

        Rick got up and stood beside the bed. "Hey."

        "Hey." Daryl sat up slightly and Rick reached down and adjusted the bed and the pillows. "How`s Paul?"

        "He`s fine. Good thing you found him when you did. Siddiq is still amazed at how you carried him through two miles of woods without passing out."

        "Bein` chased by a herd of walkers keeps ya on your toes."

         Rick sat back down. "Good to see you."

        "Good to see ya, too."

        An awkward moment passed between them. "Gonna snow."

        "Been snowin`. Virginia gets damn cold this time of year." Daryl still felt slightly dizzy and was glad he was in bed, otherwise he would have lost his sense of balance completely.

        "That it does. You ever figure out who shot at you?" Rick asked.

        "Nope. Didn`t see nobody. Been hidin` from marauders most of the time."

        There was a soft knock on the door frame and Jesus peered in. "Oh, I didn`t know you had a visitor."

        "Come in. We`re just talking," Rick said. "You look good."

        Jesus came in and sat down in the other empty chair. "Still have a headache." He looked at Daryl. "I have you to thank for bringing me back home."

        "What happened?" Daryl asked.

        "I was out on a run. I found some drugs and medical supplies at this ranger station and was on my way back. They sneaked up on me from behind, didn`t get a look at their faces at all."

        "Daryl said there were marauders out there, most of them former Saviors," Rick said.

        "That`s probably it," Jesus said. "Well, I wanted to drop by and thank you and also to let you know I talked Maggie into letting you stay in my trailer with me until you are better. Do you know when Siddiq will release you?"

        "Nah, probably later today," Daryl said. His and Jesus`s eyes locked for a moment. This was not lost on Rick.

        Rick stood up. "We`ll talk some more later. Michonne says 'hey'."

        "How`s Asskicker?"

        Rick grinned. "Judith heard us talking about you and wants to see her Uncle Daryl." He waved and left, passing Rosita when she entered the room carrying a tray.

        "I smell Ms. Maitlin`s cooking," Jesus said.

        "Fried chicken and all the fixings," Rosita said. "And some of her hot coffee, the best at Hilltop. She told me nothing`s good enough for you, Daryl."

        "Betty`s one of your biggest cheerleaders," Jesus said.

        "I didn`t think nobody wanted me around no more," Daryl said as Rosita put the tray on the wheeled table.

        "We all want you around," Rosita said. "Except for the few sad puppies. How they got Maggie`s ear is beyond me."

        "They were huge supporters of Gregory," Jesus said as if that explained a lot, which it did. He got up. "I`ll let you eat in peace. Just come on over when you`re ready."

        "Thanks." Daryl`s gaze followed Jesus as he left. Rosita had noticed the look and stood there staring at Daryl with a smile on her face. "What?" Daryl asked as he uncovered the plate of food.

        "Nothing." She laughed. "He thinks Ms. Maitlin is your biggest cheerleader? He needs to listen to himself. I`ll be in the examination room. Just holler if you need anything."

        Daryl sat there and pondered what Rosita had just said as he ate. He knew that whenever he was near Paul there was a sense of peace about him. Even in his exile there were times he could not stop thinking about Paul Rovia. There were feelings that were somewhat alien to him, but they were there all the same. They were feelings that had been suppressed for a long time due to the war with the Saviors, but now that things had calmed down they were resurfacing again with a vengeance. He had a strong desire to just take Paul into his arms and hold him as close as he could never wanting to let go.

                                                                      *****

         Jesus was surprised when the door to the downstairs storage room just down the hallway from the kitchen opened and he turned around to take on the person who entered, but lowered his arms when he realized it was only Bertie.

        "Sorry I surprised you," she said. "You`re supposed to be in bed."

        "I got cold. There`s something wrong with the space heater. It only works half the time. I was looking for some more blankets since I offered to take Daryl into my trailer." Jesus started to sort through the blankets which were much in demand at the moment. "I wish I could go on a run and find some more blankets."

        "You need to stop being gone from here on runs or recruiting for long periods of time."

        "I know. Mostly it was to get away from Gregory. Things are better now with Maggie in charge."

        Bertie looked at him with concern. "You seem lonely, Jesus. What`s really wrong?"

        "I don`t know. I sometimes feel there`s no direction or purpose to my life." It was a question he had often asked himself.

        "Maybe something will come along. Opening up to someone is a good start. Don`t close yourself off so much. Surely there`s someone who could use your help," Bertie said.

        Jesus sighed. "There may be someone."

        "You`re thinking of Daryl aren`t you? A lot of people don`t want him here at Hilltop, think that he`s too far gone," Bertie said with emphasis.

        "Like everyone else he`s trying to make sense of things that don`t. He was angry and for a good reason. He`s coming back to his senses, yet, nobody believes him. He goes about things differently because that`s all he`s ever known." Jesus sat down as a wave of dizziness passed over him. "He can`t be out there alone anymore."

        "Maybe he doesn`t want our help," Bertie said.

        "Maybe he does and doesn`t know it." Jesus could feel the anger well up inside of him as he stood back up and grabbed the stack of blankets he had found. "He seems pretty content at the moment. Having a double concussion combined with exhaustion would keep anyone down." He left and when he got back to his trailer, Daryl was putting a new string on his crossbow.

        "Hey," Daryl said acknowledging him.

        "I found some blankets. Can the space heater be fixed?"

        "Them things are pretty tricky," Daryl said, shrugging.

        Jesus noticed that Daryl had unpacked his bag. His clothes were dirty and there wasn`t anything for colder weather. He set the blankets on the end of the sofa. When his head started to spin Daryl quickly caught him as he fell. Jesus could feel the strength in Daryl`s muscular arms. "Whoa." Their faces almost touched when he fell forwards slightly. "Sorry."

        "It`s alright," Daryl said softly. Their eyes held steady on each other for several moments.

        Jesus let go and leaned back on the sofa. "Weather`s getting colder. Going to be harder to keep warm."

        Daryl leaned his head back and stared at the ceiling. "Paul, do ya think I`m goin` insane?"

       "No."

       Daryl looked down at the floor. "I sometimes felt loony bein` out there all alone."

       "You`re not alone anymore, Daryl." Jesus`s voice was soft and soothing.

       Daryl rubbed his head as he fought off a slight dizzy spell. "I don`t see Dwight around."

       "He took several people on an expedition to the destroyed Savior outposts looking for any supplies, weapons, food, ammo, etc. that was left behind. They`ve been gone about three weeks."

       Daryl was silent for the longest time. "Paul, I screwed up." His voice could barely be heard.

       "Daryl, we can go around in circles playing the blame game with ourselves. None of it gets us anywhere." Jesus reached over and grasped Daryl`s shoulder. "Let it go."

       "Don`t know if I can."

       "Yes, you can. You can trust me when I say that."

       "You`re one of the few people I do trust, Paul. We`ve been friends for a long time." Daryl reached up towards Jesus then lowered his hand, the uncertainty on his face. "I know one thing bein` alone kept me from."

       "What`s that?"

       Daryl felt like he was choking at what he wanted to say, but he knew he had to get it out. "When I was out there I realized I got some feelin`s about ya, Paul."

       "I`ve always suspected that," Jesus whispered as he never took his eyes away from the redneck.

       "There`s somethin` I never told nobody about."

       "That you`re gay?" Jesus laughed to himself. "Well, it`s true about me, too."

       "I heard." Daryl shrugged. "Rumors and all."

       Jesus just grinned. "It`s called gaydar."

       "What the hell is a gaydar?"

       "You`ve heard of radar."

       "Yeah."

       "It`s a play on that." Jesus leaned over until his face was only inches from Daryl`s.

       Daryl felt reluctant at first but without realizing it, his lips were suddenly on Jesus`s. Jesus slowly put his arms around Daryl and they kissed for a couple minutes.

       "Wow, I didn`t see that coming," Jesus said smiling.

       "Felt right in the moment."

       "Yeah, it did." Jesus looked deeply into Daryl`s eyes wanting to get a sense of the soul behind them. "We`ll get this figured out. Maggie will listen." He leaned over and they kissed again with intense excitement.

       "I`m not so sure. People can be real unforgivin`," Daryl said when they parted.

       "You never know. Things can turn around in a heartbeat. Like what just happened right now."

       Daryl slowly put his arms around Jesus who lowered him as their lips met again, this time not stopping to catch their breaths.

                                                                      *****

        "Okay, lift your arm until it is parallel with your shoulder," Siddiq said to Daryl as he examined him in the medical trailer. Daryl did as he asked. "Any pain?"

        "A little, but nothin` big."

        "Okay. Lower it." Daryl did so. "Now I want you to pick up your crossbow like you usually do."

        Daryl stood up and in one swift gesture he picked up his weapon and aimed it. "Little stiff," he said, then lowered it.

        "That`s expected. It should go away in a day or two. How are the dizzy spells?"

        "Not as bad."

        "Good. I still want you to stay put. I hope you don`t have any more ideas of wandering around in the wilderness by yourself. You need people, Daryl. People who can help you." Siddiq`s voice was earnest and sincere.

       Daryl looked down at the floor. "Somebody yelled 'nobody wants a loony around' on my way over here. Maybe they`re right."

       "If I have to tell you this a hundred times a day, I will. You are not crazy--insane--around the bend--whatever. Get that notion out of your head right now." Siddiq placed a reassuring hand on Daryl`s shoulder. "Sometimes you can`t make it on your own."

        "I also got a lot of dirty looks. I ain`t welcome here no more."

        Siddiq emitted an impatient sigh. "As if they have the right to be so judgmental. Like no one else has ever made mistakes? Especially as things are now?"

        "I didn`t like how those strangers threatened the children. I had to kill them. They were still Negan. I didn`t mean to turn on--." Daryl closed his eyes and grew silent for a long time. "I may have a reason to stay here."

        "I hope it`s a good one."

        "Somethin` happened between me and Paul yesterday. I ain`t sure if I should trust it."

        Siddiq smiled. "Did it feel right?"

        Daryl nodded. "Paul said it felt right for him, too."

        "Then trust it, Daryl. Jesus always seems like he`s drifting around with no real purpose. Maybe this will give him one. And you one as well."

        "It`s hard for me to talk to people about it. I always had to hide who I was."

        "People need to be true to themselves, stop being so cruel to others. There are those on your side, Rick especially. Maggie will listen to him. Hang in there, Daryl."

        Daryl hesitated then nodded. "I`ll try."

        "Good. You can go now. Come see me in three or four days."

                                                                      *****

"Quit being so restless all the time, Jesus," Maggie said in the kitchen the next day as she, Rick, and Michonne were at the table enjoying some after-breakfast coffee and cinnamon rolls.

         "Do I have a choice?" Jesus asked knowing what her answer would be.

         "No. How`s Daryl?" Maggie asked.

         Jesus had a faraway smile on his face. "Beautiful." She gave him a confused look. Rick and Michonne exchanged amused knowing smiles. "Oh, I mean, doing better." They heard the loud clatter of a pan that had been dropped behind them causing them all to jump.

         "Sorry about that," the woman behind them said, the tone of her voice indicated that she wasn`t sorry at all.

        "It`s okay, Ms. Maitlin," Maggie said.

        "That smile on your face is awful smitten, Paul," Ms. Maitlin teased. She was a well built middle-aged woman with strong facial features that someone at Hilltop said reminded them of Mercedes McCambridge. 

        "Maybe I am smitten," Jesus said. He noticed Maggie, Rick, and Michonne looking at him with wide eyes. "Well, it`s true." He paused for a moment and sighed. "Nothing major yet. Our make-out session was quite pleasant."

        "Make-out session?" Rick asked, grinning.

        "What do you mean nothing major?" Maggie asked.

        "I don`t think I`ve ever seen Daryl kiss anybody," Michonne said. "Except Judith on the top of her head."

        "He kissed me." Jesus shrugged. "We like each other."

        "You`ve been making eyes at Daryl Dixon ever since you first saw him," Ms. Maitlin said. "You so much as admitted that to me when you told me the story about the truck and the chase across the field."

        "I didn`t admit to anything," Jesus said. He knew he hadn`t convinced the others of that either.

        "Didn`t have to. It was the look on your face. That same goofy smitten smile I just saw a few seconds ago." Ms. Maitlin placed a pan of muffins in the oven and set the timer.

        "We barely knew each other then, Betty."

        Ms. Maitlin sat down with them and poured herself a mug of coffee. Everyone else was silent, enjoying the conversation and what it implied. "Pretty soon you`ll start knowing him in the biblical sense." She winked at the other three.

        "Well, I am called Jesus. It should be biblical." He felt Maggie kick him underneath the table. "Ow! I wasn`t blaspheming."

        "No, just telling a bad joke," Maggie said shaking her head and rolling her eyes.

        "Hey, there you are," Daryl said coming into the kitchen. He leaned over to give Jesus a kiss but thought better of it.

        "It`s okay," Jesus said. "They know."

        Daryl shrugged then he and Jesus kissed. Rick and Michonne high-fived each other underneath the table.

        "Sit down. Have some coffee," Ms. Maitlin said. She reached for a mug and poured Daryl one. "Want anything in it?"

        "Just black," Daryl said. "I could use a smoke."

        "You can smoke all you want. I`d have one myself, but I left the pack in my room upstairs," Ms. Maitlin said. She obviously had taken an immediate liking to Daryl and didn`t think he was going insane, just misguided by his own lack of confidence and quick temper.

        Jesus gave Daryl a hug and squeezed his hand. "What did Siddiq say?"

        "The massage you gave my shoulder helped. I held up my crossbow with hardly any pain."

        "Which means you can get some hunting done and back to killing walkers," Rick said, teasing Daryl a little.

        Jesus looked around the table, grinning from ear to ear. "I got me a rugged redneck now."

        "Little shit," Daryl mumbled under his breath. He looked at Jesus with an air of allure.

        Maggie got up. "I have work to do. See if I can rustle up some volunteers to rummage around the attic for those old Christmas decorations." She tapped Michonne on the shoulder.

        Michonne rolled her eyes and shrugged. "A promise is a promise." She got up and followed Maggie out of the kitchen.

        "So she is planning on going through with the Christmas thing," Jesus said.

        "It`s still a few weeks away yet," Ms. Maitlin said.

        "Haven`t had Christmas since Carl--." Rick closed his eyes. Without a word he got up and left.

        The others sat silent for a long time, then Jesus spoke. "He`ll never get over Carl`s death. None of us will."

        "This Christmas thing is only serving to be a sorrowful reminder to some folks," Ms. Maitlin said.

        When Jesus glanced over at Daryl he noticed an expression of melancholy on his face. The mood would change completely whenever Maggie mentioned the Christmas gathering. Jesus expected Rick to take it hard, but when he looked at Daryl he sensed the same feeling, except for a different reason.

                                                                         *****

Daryl had slept through the night on the sofa in Jesus`s trailer and when he woke up he noticed that Jesus was gone. He heard the space heater rattling and leaned over it trying to see if he could fix it, but he couldn`t determine what the problem was. The door opened and Jesus entered carrying a tray.

        "I was hoping you were awake," Jesus said.

        "Can`t get this thing to stop rattlin`."

        "I gave up on it about a week ago. It still puts out heat, but not a lot." Jesus placed the tray on the dining table and took down two plates. "Ms. Maitlin cooked us a big breakfast. She says we need one to start the day out right."

        "That`s what my Ma used to say." He noticed there was some bacon & eggs beside a biscuit with some sausage gravy. One of the pigs had been slaughtered the day before. Jesus placed some salt and pepper on the table and sat down. Daryl took his first bite. "Tastes good."

        "Betty is our best cook."

        Daryl took a few more bites then he suddenly stopped eating. "I`m lost, Paul," he said quietly.

        "You`re not lost, Daryl. A lot of things take time to heal."

        Daryl reached over and squeezed Jesus`s hand. "Anger can be real blindin`. I know that now." Daryl closed his eyes wanting to squeeze out the uncontrollable emotions that motivated him to be such an idiot at times.

        "Trying to do the right thing can be just as blinding. I was a fool believing that there were Saviors who weren`t beyond redemption. Innocents are always going to die in a war." Jesus poured Daryl a mug of coffee.

        "Maybe it`s best I leave here." Daryl looked directly at him.

        "You`re still very traumatized, Daryl, and need to process everything. You have nothing to be sorry about. Besides, if you leave, I`m coming with you."

        Daryl dug out a cigarette and lit up. "What I can`t figure out is why you don`t hate me."

        Jesus smiled. "I can`t hate you, Daryl." He paused. "I`ve had my share of boyfriends. I never got close to any of them. But you`re different. I don`t know why."

        "I liked our makin` out session a lot. What I felt hasn`t changed." He looked deeply in Jesus`s eyes. "I`d stay here at Hilltop just to be with you."

        Jesus got up and came around the table to stand behind Daryl and wrapped his arms around him. "Life here is pretty quiet. I think it`s what you need right now." He brushed Daryl`s hair aside and kissed the back of his neck. They heard the wind rattle the windows of the trailer. "Another cold one today."

        Daryl glanced at the space heater. "That thing`s a piece of shit." He turned around and flirtatiously winked at Jesus who bent down. They kissed long and passionately. 

       "Food`s getting cold."

       "Umhmm." They kissed again then Jesus returned to his seat and they resumed eating.

                                                                      *****

        As Daryl crossed the foyer of Barrington House he heard voices coming from the library and headed in that direction to stand in the doorway noticing Rick playing with Judith and baby Hershel Rhee. He suddenly grabbed the door frame when a wave of dizziness caused him to lose his balance. Rick was quickly by his side catching him before he fell to the floor.

        "Come on, let`s sit down," Rick said as he escorted Daryl to a nearby chair.

        "Uncle Daryl!" Judith cried out and ran over to him, throwing her arms around him. She had grown a lot over the four months he was gone. Even though his head was still spinning Daryl was able to return the hug. She gave him a kiss on the cheek.

        "She never called me that before," Daryl said when Judith went back to playing.

        "She`s learned to say a lot of things," Rick said. "She never forgets anyone she likes, either, such as Uncle Paul."

        Maggie entered the library overhearing what Rick had said. "She`s quite fond of both of her uncles."

        Daryl`s head was finally clearing up. He didn`t meet Maggie`s intense gaze.

        "Another dizzy spell," Rick said.

       Maggie nodded. "I just came in to check if everything was alright." She made a face at Hershel when he pointed at her.

       "Judith, Hershel, and I are having a great time," Rick said smiling. The few times that he did smile was when he played with the children.

       "Don`t go away, Uncle Daryl," Judith said looking at him.

       "Did ya miss me?" Daryl asked her.

       "Uh huh." Judith looked at him for a bit longer before moving her gaze over to Rick.

       Rick looked up at Maggie who was biting her lip. He sighed. "What can I say to convince you it`s in the best interest of Hilltop that you let Daryl stay."

       Daryl shrugged. "She`s gotta do what her people want. They don`t want me here."

       "Just the few who don`t get it." Rick looked at Maggie with a steady gaze. "To hell with them. If they don`t like it here they can go."

       "I have to consider everything and everybody in my decision. It takes time," Maggie said.

       "Michonne and I will talk to people," Rick said. "Make them come to their senses."

       "I ain`t got nothin` to prove," Daryl spat.

       "Just do what you normally do," Rick said. "You don`t have to prove anything."

        Judith brought over a stuffed squirrel to Daryl. "Kiss Jinkeez."

        Daryl kissed the stuffed squirrel. "There. How`s that?"

       "Jinkeez likes you, Uncle Daryl. Don`t eat him."

        Maggie and Rick could hardly contain their laughter. "Jinkeez likes everybody," Rick said.

        "He doesn`t like you, Daddy." Judith then let out a string of giggles.

        Rick shrugged. "Sorry."

        "I`m better lookin`," Daryl said casually. He stood up, the dizzy spell gone. "Gonna help Maisie with the cars." He waved at Judith. "Bye."

        "See ya, Uncle Daryl." She waved back as he left the library.

                                                           ***          *          ***

**ACT 2**

 

        The weather was mild enough later that morning so Jesus headed for the storage shed that was outside the fence near the area where they kept the cars. The boom box was playing AC/DC`s  _Get It Hot_ at low volume as Daryl and Hilltop`s car mechanic, Maisie, worked on an SUV`s engine. Jesus was getting ready to dig around for some supplies. Every once in a while he would smile at Daryl and Daryl would wink back.

        "It should be a crime," Daryl said as a cigarette dangled from his mouth and he looked up to admire Jesus`s ass as he bent over to pick up the dropped set of keys.

        "How`s that?" Maisie asked wishing Daryl would concentrate more on the engine. She was one of the few who didn`t judge Daryl.

        "Playin` AC/DC at low volume."

        "You`ll do nothing but attract a bunch of walkers," Jesus said as he unlocked and opened the door to the shed which was suddenly pushed open from the inside and the familiar sound of a walker was heard as it burst out running right into Jesus. He was knocked over and he pushed on the walker`s chest to keep from being bitten with one hand and grabbing for a piece of rebar with the other and promptly used it to give a good shove through the walker`s head. He rested there on the ground as walker goo dripped down all over him. "Goddammit. I just put this clean shirt on this morning." He shoved the walker off of him.

        "Surprise," Maisie said casually as she handed Daryl a wrench.

        Jesus got up and looked into the storage shed. "There`s a big hole in the back." He looked down at his messed up shirt. "Son-of-a-bitch," he mumbled. He glanced at Daryl who was staring at him, the amusement in his eyes. "I hate doing laundry."

        Daryl just shrugged and hissed a short laugh. Jesus took a moment to drag the dead walker off to the side.

       "What are you looking for anyway?" Maisie asked.

       "This is for Maggie. She thinks there might be more Christmas decorations." Jesus grabbed a box and noticed it had been marked as 'junk' and set it aside. There was the sound of rattling bottles inside. "What the hell?" He opened it and found several bottles of booze. "Damn that Gregory. This is one of his booze boxes."

        "He hid them all over the place," Maisie said.

        "Maggie will want this for the celebration." Jesus pulled out one of the bottles. "Wild Turkey. The man had taste." He put the bottle back in the box and set it aside.

        The rest of the morning went smoothly as Jesus continued to make his way through the myriad of boxes, even finding some light strings that most likely had been put up outdoors. Daryl and Maisie did all they could to winterize the vehicles then helped Jesus with his task. Daryl peered into a box and found a carton of cigarettes which he promptly tucked into his coat. He watched as Jesus picked off the dried bits of walker goo. "I don`t do laundry."

        "That`s why your clothes are always dirty," Jesus said.

       "Looks like you`re the one with the dirty shirt," Daryl teased.

       "That will be rectified as soon as I am done here."

       "You`re in luck. Last box," Maisie said. She opened it and found out it was full of winter items--some scarves, knitted beanies, gloves. Jesus suddenly saw a grey beanie and immediately grabbed it.

       "Lost mine on a recent run," Jesus said. Maisie rolled her eyes.

       "Why do ya like them things anyway?" Daryl asked. "Ya look silly."

       "I do not. You`d look silly." Jesus playfully pulled the beanie down over Daryl`s head then ran away a few steps. Daryl was on him and grabbed him around the waist and they wrestled to the ground. Jesus had Daryl pinned then bent down and kissed him.

       "Whew, ya stink. Go change your shirt," Daryl said.

       "You stink, too. You smell like motor oil." Jesus crawled off of him.

       "If you two are going to horse around, I`m going inside and get warm," Maisie said and opened the gate in the fence and left.

       "Want to help me repair the hole in the shed then put all the boxes back?" Jesus asked.

       "Nah. I`ll do it anyway." Daryl got up and brushed the light layer of snow off of him.

       "Maggie won`t be disappointed," Jesus said. "Found those Christmas lights for her."

       "Who cares about Christmas these days?" Daryl asked as he surveyed the hole.

       "Maggie does. Maybe she wants to bring people together after all that`s happened. What have you got against it?" This was another mystery Jesus was intent on unraveling about his new boyfriend.

       "My Ma would fix a dinner, the old man would go on a bender. Nothin` more than that." Daryl grabbed the corner of a canvass he saw in the corner. "We can use this to cover up the hole."

        Jesus knew Daryl had had a sad life full of disappointment, but he didn`t realize until that moment just how bad it had been. He picked up the other end of the canvass and they proceeded with their task.

                                                                       *****

        The mild temperatures of the morning got warmer as the afternoon sun shone high and bright, the sound of melting snow the background to the usual daily activities. Clouds could be seen in the distance as Eduardo observed the landscape with binoculars from his position on the sentry platform. "Oh shit," he said quietly.

        "What is it?" Shapiro, a refugee from The Kingdom, asked. He was on the other sentry platform.

        Eduardo pointed towards the trees that were some distance from the road. "Walkers. A pretty good herd coming out of the woods."

        Shapiro shaded his eyes and he could see the movements of them as they emerged into the field. More and more kept pouring out so it was difficult to ascertain the exact number. He turned around and cupped his hands. "Walkers! Secure the gates. Get everyone inside the fence," he shouted.

        Maggie was just emerging from Barrington House when she heard the alarm. She knew that Daryl and Jesus were still out back digging through the shed. "Bertie, Daryl and Jesus are by the cars. Go get them. Hurry."

        Bertie dropped her bundle and hurried towards the rear of the house, moments later returning with Daryl and Jesus, who went to Jesus`s trailer to get their weapons. All the residents of Hilltop were scrambling to get ready for the attack. Rick and Michonne came out of the house their weapons at the ready. The gate was secured by the extra board that had been recently made for that purpose.

        "How much ammo do we have?" Cal, who had just secured the gate, asked Eduardo.

        "We`re okay for now."

        "How many?" Maggie asked.

        "Looks like about a hundred, give or take," Eduardo replied.

        "I want all sentry posts armed," Maggie said. "All noise needs to be shut down. If the fence holds we should be okay." She noticed Daryl and Jesus emerge onto the lawn fully armed. Daryl had a full quiver of bolts slung on his back as well as the ones in his crossbow. Jesus had his knives at the ready as well as his assault rifle fully equipped with a silencer. They stood front and center beside Rick and Michonne facing the gate as the growls of the walker herd came closer. If any broke through they would be the first ones to get them.

        "At least your shirt`s dirty," Daryl said.

        "I`m going to have to use the hard brush to wash it out. I hate that thing," Jesus said.

        "There`s a whole herd of walkers out there and all you`re worrying about is your laundry?" Michonne asked.

        Jesus just shrugged. They heard the first of the walkers bang against the fence. Any that got near Eduardo and Shapiro were stabbed with a spear.

        "What about that weak spot in the fence?" Cal asked. "You know, the one by the gardens."

        "You mean to tell me that hasn`t been repaired yet?" Maggie asked.

        "Haven`t had time to cut down the trees for the logs," Cal said.

        There was the sound of splintering wood and all of their attention was drawn to the weak spot that Cal had been referring to. There was now a hole in the fence and walkers were spilling through it. Daryl immediately went into action shooting with his crossbow. Jesus quickly followed with a couple shots from the assault rifle. Michonne went into action with her katana and Rick with an assault rifle and his ax. They ran towards the opening ready for the fight. The other Hilltoppers went into action as well. A walker grabbed Maisie`s arm and just as it was about to bite down Jesus knifed it in the head.

        "We`ve got to seal that breach," Maggie said. She and some others went to look for some lumber to at least put on a temporary patch. A walker came up on Daryl from behind him, surprising him as it knocked him to the ground. His leg narrowly missed getting bit, but he quickly unsheathed his skinning knife and plunged it into the walker`s head. When he withdrew the knife it had broken in half from too much use. Jesus gave him a hand up and they continued the fight. Any they missed were gotten by Rick or Michonne as the others focused on getting the patch into place. Five minutes later Maggie was running over with a hammer and nails as some of the others hauled lumber. Daryl ran to the sentry post that Eduardo occupied and helped him fend off the walkers that were pushing against the gate. Rick stood by Shapiro.

        Within an hour the fight was over with no one getting bitten or killed. A few were injured but Siddiq was taking care of them in his usual swift manner. Some residents even thanked Daryl as he gathered his bolts from the dead walkers telling him he belonged with them at Hilltop. Jesus was scouring the corpses to make sure all of them were dead in case they missed any that got pinned or buried.

        "See? People can change their minds and see that you`re not crazy," Jesus said to Daryl.

        Maggie came over to them. "Let`s get someone else to clean up."

       "We`re also a mess," Michonne said grinning.

       "Just like old times," Rick added.

       "Ms. Maitlin`s got baths ready for you and clean clothes laid out," Maggie said as she clapped Daryl on the back.

                                                                       *****

        Jesus, Rick, Michonne, and Daryl sat in the kitchen after cleaning up, now eating a hearty meal that Ms. Maitlin had prepared. Ms. Maitlin was behind them doing dishes. "That fight should be proof enough that you need to stay here," she said.

        Jesus reached over and clasped Daryl`s hand. "She`s right."

        "What you had was a breakdown. It happens to everyone," Rick said. 

        "I think they`re just scared of your temper," Michonne said. "After that fight with the walkers, they should see things differently."

        "I know my temper gets me in trouble a lot," Daryl said. His fingers were messy from what he was eating so in his usual manner he licked them and got a curious look from Jesus.

        "What you need is some stability," Jesus said not sure to laugh or be disgusted. He put his arm around Daryl anyway and briefly rested his head on Daryl`s shoulder.

        They didn`t notice Ms. Maitlin smiling in a knowing way. "Gonna get cold tonight. Did you see those clouds in the distance?" She refilled their mugs of coffee.

        "Can`t be snow. Today is so mild," Michonne said.

        "A good storm coming our way." Ms. Maitlin said. "You get that space heater fixed?"

        "Ain`t fixable," Daryl said.

        "You two can`t stay in the trailer. Those things are cold as hell inside as well as out if there`s no heat," Ms. Maitlin said.

        "There aren`t any more trailers available and all the rooms here are full," Jesus said. "Where are we going to go?"

        "There`s a bunch of sleeping bags in the storeroom back here. Get a fire going in the parlor. You`ll be warm and cozy," Ms. Maitlin said winking at Rick and Michonne.

        "Maggie wants to use the parlor for the Christmas celebration," Jesus said.

        "That`s a couple weeks away yet," Ms. Maitlin said. "It`s either the parlor or you freeze your asses off. Your choice." She went back over to the sink.

        Jesus and Daryl looked at each other and sighed. "The parlor it is," Jesus said.

        "Umhmm," Daryl replied. "That sofa don`t look too comfortable. Can`t turn over."

        "Who said you were sleeping on the sofa?" Jesus asked.

        Daryl shrugged. "Thought that was our arrangement."

        "Sleep together, boys. You`ll be warmer," Ms. Maitlin said not turning around from her task.

        Daryl and Jesus both glanced at her then at each other. Daryl glanced at Rick.

        "Hey, I`m out of this conversation," Rick said lightly concentrating on sipping his coffee.

        Ms. Maitlin burst into laughter. "The way you two have been carrying on you`ll get to cuddling and kissing and lord knows what will happen next."

        "You have a raunchy mind, Betty," Jesus said.

        "Not any raunchier than yours, Paul," Ms. Maitlin said.

        "Or yours, Daryl," Michonne said. She then started to laugh.

        When Jesus looked at Daryl he was hiding his face in his hands. "Now look what you`ve done. You made him blush, you guys."

        "You`re awful cute when you do that," Rick said.

        "Shut up," Daryl said his voice muffled by his hands.

        Rick only sat there and laughed. "Yeah, time to get raunchy."

                                                                       *****

        The fire in the parlor was warm and inviting as Daryl and Jesus laid together between two sleeping bags that had been placed on top of a mattress.

        "Do Freddie`s clothes fit you better?" Jesus asked as he relaxed with his hands behind the pillow.

        "Yeah."

        "He was a big guy and according to Ms. Maitlin, most of your wardrobe had to be burned. Not your vest, of course."

        Daryl fluffed his pillow and turned his head to stare at Jesus. He reached over and stroked Jesus`s hair as the firelight seemed to dance over it. "It felt good killin` them walkers by your side."

        "We do make a good team," Jesus said, yawning, then closing his eyes enjoying the gentle caresses.

        "We do." Daryl was feeling sleepy and dug himself deeper into the pillow.

        They shared a long kiss then decided to settle down for the night, each on their own side of the makeshift bed.

                                                                        *****

The next morning dawned bright and white since it had snowed during the night. Jesus was the first to open his eyes. They obviously had shifted positions during the night because Daryl was huddled close to his chest and Jesus had put his arm around him. He lightly kissed the top of Daryl`s head causing him to stir slightly but didn`t awaken. There was a loud bang from the kitchen which was right next to the parlor and that is what caused Daryl to wake up.

         "What was that?" Daryl asked in a sleepy voice.

        "Ms. Maitlin starting breakfast." Jesus`s voice was soft and low. "She does that on purpose just to see who`s awake and who`s not."

        "I`m awake alright." Daryl sat up and wiped the sleep from his eyes. 

        They shared a kiss then crawled out of bed, put on their socks and headed straight for the kitchen. The smell of freshly brewing coffee, frying bacon and eggs greeted them.

        "And your clothes are still on. Amazing," Ms. Maitlin said as she glanced at them.

        "Too early in the morning to go there, Betty," Jesus said somewhat annoyed.

        "If you`re like me you want a good smoke to start off the morning." Ms. Maitlin tossed a pack of Morley`s and some matches on the table in front of Daryl.

        "You must read minds," Daryl said as he lit up.

        "Palms, too. You two sleep alright?" There was a sly grin on her face.

        "Yes and nothing happened," Jesus replied.

        "Yet," Daryl said licking his lips.

        "The best part was we were warm. No wrestling with a fickle space heater." Jesus`s hand ran up and down Daryl`s thigh.

        "You need to throw it out," Ms. Maitlin said. "Fire hazard when they don`t work right." The coffee was done so she poured them each a mug.

        "I guess we spend the rest of the winter on the parlor floor," Jesus said. He noticed Daryl staring at him. "What?"

        "Nothing."

        They ate a good breakfast then headed back to the parlor to remove the sleeping bags and put the mattress aside.

        "You looked at me strange earlier, but I know it was something," Jesus said.

        Daryl hesitated a moment. "Ya said 'we'," he finally said. "Depends on if people want me to stay here don`t it."

        "You need to trust Maggie. When I said 'we', it felt natural." Jesus reached over and caressed Daryl`s cheek before returning to his task.

        "Yeah, I dig ya, Paul. Feelin` stronger every day." Daryl`s voice was quiet, his shyness coming across as quite endearing to Jesus.

        "We take things as they come at their own pace. I know Betty jokes about certain things, but that`s just how she is."

        "I don`t think we`re a joke. Do ya?"

        "No." Jesus dropped what he was doing and they embraced. "Each day I feel we`re getting closer. It scares the hell out of me because I`m not one who gets close to people. I can`t seem to help it, Daryl. I want you close to me all the time."

        "I can`t fight it no more, Paul." Daryl`s lips were on his and they stood there kissing and necking. There was a soft knock on one of the parlor`s double French doors and Maggie entered.

        "Good morning," she said. "Is it alright to come in?"

        They parted and stood there with their arms around each other.

        "Yeah, we were just clearing things out," Jesus said.

        "I can see that," Maggie said, a bit amused. "You two wouldn`t want to help me rearrange the furniture in here later today would you?"

        "Fine with me," Daryl said.

        "Since we`ll be on the parlor floor all winter we could use the space," Jesus said.

        "We`ll figure something else out," Maggie said. "As long as the two of you are warm. Don`t need anyone getting sick. I`ll let you finish up. The downstairs bathroom is all yours." She closed the door.

        "Is there a lock on those doors?" Jesus asked.

        "Why?"

        "If things get more serious between us we may need it."

        "Oh," Daryl nodded. "Right." 

        "Maggie likes to barge in. Get my drift?" Jesus said with a raised eyebrow.

        Daryl nodded. "Probably a skeleton key."

        "Ms. Maitlin would have the keys. In my opinion, padlocking it would be best, but I think we can find another way to keep people out when we need to."

        Daryl stretched. "I think Rick and I will do some huntin` today."

        "Now that`s the Daryl Dixon I`m used to."

        "Michonne says anger makes you stupid. She`s right."

        "Don`t dwell on it. Sometimes you have to get out of your own way."

        Daryl stood there and pondered that thought for a moment. Merle sometimes told him he was his own worst enemy. Daryl never paid that much attention because it required him to go inside himself and he was one to avoid that whenever possible. He now realized with a growing intimate relationship with Paul Rovia developing, deeper than he had ever hoped or expected, he would have to change his way of thinking and finally face the reality of the shit of his past and present. As far as he could tell he had help from the man standing across from him. Daryl had more control over his anger when he was around Paul, the man had a soothing calming effect around everyone he met, but Daryl most of all. If only he hadn`t screwed up so bad four months ago.

                                                                        *****

Later that morning there was a honk from a truck at the front gate and it was opened to admit the truck followed by two more trucks and three cars. The lead truck had a snowplow hooked onto it. Maggie came out onto the lawn and waved to them. Rick came up beside her.

        "Our runners are back," she said smiling.

        "Looks like they got quite a haul, too," Rick said just as pleased.

        The vehicles stopped and Dwight, Carol, Ezekiel, Jerry, Nabila, Tara, Father Gabriel, and Aaron got out and were greeted all around with hugs and 'welcome backs' as the residents of Hilltop gathered around them.

        "Yes, it is what it looks like," Carol said to Maggie and Rick. "Food, weapons, fuel, ammo, grenades, drugs, medical supplies, clothing, beds, booze, videos, CD`s, and so much other stuff we`ll be sorting through it for the rest of the winter."

        Rick and Dwight shook hands. "Good to be back. We weren`t sure if we`d make it through the snow, but as you can see we found a snowplow," Dwight said.

       Carol saw Daryl standing next to Jesus. "Well, will you look who`s here." She and Daryl embraced. "Where the hell have you been?"

       "Out wanderin`, driftin`," Daryl replied softly.

       "He found me hurt and brought me back here," Jesus said. "He was also hurt."

       Carol looked alarmed.

       "I`m alright," Daryl said. "Just a dizzy spell once in a while."

       "We`ll tell you all about it inside," Maggie said. "I`ll let Ms. Maitlin know you`re back and she`ll have you warm in no time."

       Carol noticed Jesus and Daryl put their arms around each other. She glanced at Rick.

       "Lots of other developments, too," Rick simply said.

       "I can`t wait to hear about it," Carol said as Ezekiel came up beside her and offered his arm. She linked hers with his and they went inside the house.

                                                                       *****

Ms. Maitlin fixed them all a hot meal and they sat around the large table in the formal dining room conversing about their adventures over coffee and homemade sweet rolls.

       "We must have hit a dozen outposts," Dwight said. "When it thaws we`re going to hit a few more as well as supply garrisons and cache outposts."

       "Hopefully no one raids them," Aaron said. "We found some bunk beds so we can make those two extra trailers into bunkhouses."

       "The Saviors may have taken a lot," Father Gabriel said, "but we take back to give back."

       They conversed some more about their haul for another half hour before breaking up. Dwight came over to Daryl. "It`s good to see you again. Where did you go?"

        "Here and there," Daryl said. He and Dwight still had a coldness between them but as time went on their relationship improved, especially since Dwight was making an effort to work things out. Going on the run to raid former Savior outposts was a step in the right direction.

        "Look, I understand why you did what you did, why you lost your temper. I know you didn`t mean to threaten to kill anyone at Hilltop who got in your way, who tried to interfere," Dwight said. "Maggie needs to stop catering to the bitter minority."

        Rick came over to them. "He`s right. To me that 'bitter minority' is the real threat."

        Dwight leaned over to Daryl. "Consider this. If you weren`t here when I got back I would have gone looking for you." He then left the dining room.

        "I would have gone with him," Rick said.

        Daryl wasn`t quite sure what to say. He felt Jesus squeeze his hand and nudge him. "Come on, let`s go."

        Daryl nodded and followed Jesus out.

       "Do you think he`s come back to his senses?" Carol asked Rick as she and Ezekiel stood beside him.

       "I don`t think he`s ever lost them," Rick said.

       "With some people the torrent of emotions can be too much when they happen all at once," Ezekiel said. "I trust Daryl. And I trust Maggie to do the right thing."

       "Let`s go get some rest," Carol said and she and Ezekiel left.

                                                                       *****

       "I hope rearranging the furniture to accommodate the tree didn`t mess up your bedding," Maggie said to Daryl and Jesus that evening as they prepared to go into the parlor for the night. "We also cleared that whole area in front of the fireplace."

       "We`ll be alright," Jesus said. They all said their good nights then Daryl and Jesus entered the parlor. Jesus closed the French doors firmly and pulled the curtains on the windows. "A little privacy." Daryl only shrugged. Jesus pulled a skeleton key out of his pocket. "Think we should lock it?"

        "Wouldn`t hurt. Where`d ya find it?"

       "Courtesy of Betty Maitlin." Jesus slipped the key into the keyhole and turned it. They heard the lock click.

       The mattress had already been put down so all they had to to do was place the sleeping bags on top of it. Daryl built up the fire more. The wind rattled the windows and they could hear sleet pelting against the glass. Daryl slipped off his vest and shirt. They both removed their boots and socks not taking their eyes off of each other.

       "That nap I had this afternoon helped with my headache," Jesus said. "I`m not getting them as much anymore."

       "That`s good. Haven`t had a dizzy spell in a while," Daryl said. He was amazed at how Jesus looked so soft in the firelight, his hair draping over his face in soft wisps. He took off his undershirt and set it aside.

       Jesus removed his two shirts and neatly draped them over the back of a chair. They both now sat shirtless just gazing at each other. Jesus loved how Daryl`s muscles seemed to ripple with every move. Even in the dim light he could see the scars on Daryl`s torso and back. "Daryl, if I had my wish, I would never want you to know pain again."

       Daryl looked down knowing exactly what he meant. "Can`t be avoided."

       "I know. It`s okay to wish for something even if it doesn`t come true." Jesus got up and stood behind Daryl. He gently massaged the sore shoulder. Daryl placed his hand on Jesus`s to stop it from moving. They clasped hands and just remained in those positions for several seconds. Jesus then came around to the front and knelt down, placing his hands on Daryl`s shoulders and slowly running them down Daryl`s arms until they both held hands. Jesus pulled Daryl out of the chair until they were both kneeling. Without words they both closed their eyes, put their arms around each other, and kissed ever so lightly at first, then becoming even more urgent as their feelings grew in intensity. Daryl could feel Jesus`s hair tickle his skin. His hands ran up and down Jesus`s lean but hard back and torso. They kissed for a little bit longer then Jesus rested his head on Daryl`s shoulder. "I think it`s time," he quietly said just wanting Daryl to hold him in his arms.

       "Yeah, I do too." Daryl`s voice was hoarse and his breathing deep and intense with anticipation.

       They stood up and Jesus took Daryl`s hand and led him over towards the makeshift bed. They faced each other and kissed their arms tightly encircling their torsos. Jesus undid the fly on Daryl`s pants and reached down and rubbed his hand in Daryl`s pubic hair. Daryl took a deep intake of breath and shivered slightly at the gentle touch. He loosened Jesus`s pants and reached underneath and placed his hands on his lover`s butt-cheeks as his lips tickled Jesus`s beard. Jesus leaned his head back enjoying the tenderness of the kisses and touches. For such a muscular man Daryl could be so gentle and loving. They roughly kissed and necked for a minute then Jesus slowly slid Daryl`s pants down his hands roving over Daryl`s ass, his fingers lightly flicking Daryl`s anus.

        "You like frottage?" Jesus asked almost whispering. He brushed back Daryl`s hair from his eyes and looked deeply into them.

       "Love it," Daryl replied his voice breathless with desire. He had never felt such loving caresses from anyone in his life; it was almost a new feeling for him. His pants slid down to the floor and he stepped out of them. 

        Jesus took off his pants and they now both stood there, the flames reflecting from their naked bodies as the heat between them increased. Jesus`s fingers lightly tickled Daryl`s skin as he explored his lover feeling as if he was discovering something new. In a way it was new to him. Other boyfriends had only been there to satisfy his lust, never getting close, but with Daryl he felt he could touch another lonely soul who knew pain, abandonment, and cruelty.

       "My heart has a mind of its own now," Jesus said. "I have to follow it."

       "I want it to lead to me," Daryl said as he tenderly lowered Jesus onto the bed. Once they were both relaxed they lay side by side kissing, licking, and rubbing against one another as the desire within them slowly built up, the heat of the flames seeming to reach out towards them and fueling the love they felt toward one another.

       "No one knows how much time we have," Jesus said feeling Daryl`s breath tickle his ear causing him to let out a short laugh of delight. "So let`s make the best of it." He reached down and clasped both of their hardening cocks together. Daryl could feel the stirrings of his fluids as he grew even harder. Jesus kissed Daryl`s neck then left a hickey as his playful nature guided him. Daryl embraced him tighter has he thrust himself against Jesus, nuzzling his face close to Jesus`s beard, his lips then hot on Jesus`s lips.

       Jesus moaned at the ecstasy he felt as Daryl`s frantic kisses brought forth the arousal he had so long wanted. The type that was driven by love rather than lust, and it made it all the better.

      "I love ya, Paul," Daryl said, his voice trembling. Pre-cum dripped from the tip of his cock. Jesus used it to lubricate his grip, mixing it with his own. He could sense the need in Daryl`s embrace and wanted to fulfill that need knowing that Daryl was giving it his all to please him.

      "I love you, Daryl," Jesus said softly. He closed his eyes, the back and forth of their lovemaking causing him to shiver. Daryl stiffened and tightened his embrace as he let out a loud moan feeling the warm slipperiness of his ejaculation lubricate Jesus`s grip. Jesus then let out a slight 'oh' and emitted a soft cry of joy when it was his turn to come, then giggled.

                                                                       *****

     That next morning a beam of sunlight hit Jesus right in the eyes. He scrunched up his face and grabbed the extra pillow. Then he remembered the night before. Daryl`s arm was slung over his chest and he could hear the big redneck snoring softly. It was a calm moment in a sea of peace and quiet as he remembered the gratifying sex of--until there was a loud knocking on the parlor door and the rattling of the knob.

         "Hey, why is this locked?" Maggie called from the other side.

        "Oh shit," Jesus said. He reached over and shook Daryl awake. "Maggie wants in here."

        "Huh?" Daryl said blinking the sleep from his brain.

        "Maggie`s at the door."

        "Unlock this door," Maggie said. "Everything alright in there?"

        "We`re fine," Jesus called back. "Just--sort of undressed at the moment."

        They could hear Maggie snickering. "I see. Be back in a few." Outside she turned in the direction of her office and left the door open as she sat down at her desk to look over an inventory list of the newly brought supplies. About ten minutes later a disheveled Jesus and Daryl came in, both still sleepy, but hastily dressed and still barefoot.

        "We put all the stuff aside," Daryl said.

        "That`s fine. We`re going to start decorating in there today." Maggie noticed something different about both of them. Daryl seemed more at peace and was smiling slightly, Jesus was relaxed and seemed more settled. "Did you two sleep well last night?"

        "When we did sleep," Jesus replied. "Later."

        "What he said," Daryl said and they both left.

        Maggie shook her head and chuckled. "Looks like two people love each other as much as we did, Glenn," she said softly. "And one of them is Daryl Dixon." She remembered how often she and Glenn would remark how Daryl needed someone in his life to help him come to terms with his past. Daryl had finally found that someone. As for Jesus, he wouldn`t be so restless and would not wander around without a purpose, sticking around Hilltop instead of going off alone and putting himself in more danger than what was necessary. Knowing that, she knew she had a lot to consider concerning Daryl`s fate.

                                                                       *****

"What`s with the furniture in the foyer?" Carol asked Michonne and Maggie later that day in Maggie`s office.

        "We`ll be setting up for our community Christmas celebrations on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I`m still looking for more tables and chairs," Maggie said.

        "We were wondering while driving back if you were still going forward with it," Carol said. "Good thing we brought some lights, decorations, and gift wrap." Carol`s expression became serious. "Rick told me Daryl looked like he`d been living like an animal when he showed up. Siddiq said he was malnourished and exhausted."

        "He`s doing much better now," Michonne said. "Pretty soon he`ll be as good as new." She didn`t know if that was good news or bad news, more like a mixture of both.

       Maggie was silent for a long time. "For the record I personally don`t think he`s crazy," she finally said. She got up and looked out the window, the snowy landscape white and bright in the afternoon sun. Daryl and Jesus were chasing each other around in the snow like a couple teenagers, slipping and sliding, tumbling and throwing snow at each other with fun and abandon. Michonne and Carol came over and stood by her side. They watched as Daryl finally caught up to Jesus and they embraced and kissed passionately whirling around in a circle then hugging each other before separating. Daryl headed for the car pool, Jesus towards the house.

       Carol smiled slightly, delighted by what she had just witnessed. "Now that`s something I never expected to see."

       They heard the front door open. After hanging up his snow covered coat Jesus came into the office. "Oh, sorry, I didn`t know anyone was here."

       "I saw what happened with you and Daryl a moment ago," Carol said. "How is he doing?"

       Jesus looked directly at Carol. "He`s healing. Not only physically, but mentally. Emotionally he has a long way to go, but he has a good start."

       "Daddy told me to always give a person the chance to become whole again if he goes astray. It`s up to that person if he takes opportunity of that chance or throws it away," Maggie said.

       "Daryl is trying very hard to heal from all of the hurt," Jesus said. "From before the walkers as well as after. I`m one of the few people he`s shared his innermost thoughts. I love him, and he loves me."

       "From what I`ve seen he is succeeding," Michonne observed.

       "He wants to be a productive member of this community," Jesus said. "In fact, we both feel good enough to do some hunting tomorrow."

       "I`ve always known Daryl to be a good man at heart," Carol said. "And strong."

       Daryl appeared in the doorway his coat still covered with snow, a cigarette dangling from his mouth. "Maisie needs the keys to the tool shed."

       As Carol left the office she passed right by Daryl. "You still need a haircut." They heard Jesus snickering.

       Daryl flashed him a 'shut up' look. "The keys?" Maggie opened the drawer and tossed them to him. Without another word he left.

       "Give him time to process everything," Jesus said. He then left the office.

       Maggie sighed. "I have to supervise the Christmas decorating."

       "Daryl is getting help. He shouldn`t feel the need to run away or go off half-cocked if something doesn`t go right," Michonne said.

       "I know. I still have to hear what the other side has to say." They heard noises in the foyer indicating her assistants for the rest of the afternoon had arrived. It was time to start to get back to celebrating their good fortune again. Maggie could feel the Christmas spirit within her begin to stir and she hoped the feeling would pass on to the others.

                                                             ***         *         ***

**ACT 3**

 

         A couple days had passed and Jesus now hurried towards Barrington House as fast as he could with the large box he was carrying as a winter wind whipped around him almost causing him to drop it. Maggie opened the door for him and he hurried inside and set the box down on the floor bending over to catch his breath. 

         "Why is the greenhouse constructed on the other side of Hilltop?" he asked between puffs.

         Maggie looked inside the box and took out the first plant. "Thank you for hurrying. These are tropical plants you know." She now held a magnificent specimen of a red poinsettia. "We`ve been trying to get these to grow all summer." She glanced over at Daryl who was finishing up his morning coffee. "Don`t these look great?"

        "Yeah," he said his tone indifferent. He set his empty mug aside. "I`m gonna walk the perimeter." He put on his coat and gloves, grabbed his crossbow and without another word headed out the door. Maggie`s expression changed from glee to astonishment.

        "Something wrong between you two?" Michonne asked as she took a string of silver garland out of a box.

        "Not anything unusual. Why?" Jesus asked.

       "Ever since I announced we`re going to have a Christmas celebration at Hilltop he seems a bit hostile about it, that`s all," Maggie said.

       "I`ve learned not to force it. He`ll get around to talking about something in his own time." Jesus took another poinsettia plant out of the box. "I`m just glad these things didn`t freeze with all the snow and ice out there."

       "What more perfect atmosphere could one ask for?" Carol said as she untangled a string of lights.

       They heard Bertie and Eduardo coming down the stairs both carrying boxes. "Oh, here are those Victorian ornaments I found in the attic. Some of them must be over a hundred years old," Maggie said.

       "Good thing the Saviors didn`t want them," Bertie said.

       "Where should we put them?" Eduardo asked.

       "In the parlor. That`s where we`re going to set up the Christmas tree. Did you find the stand?" Maggie asked.

       "Yeah, there are still some boxes up there," Bertie said.

       "Good. Now all we have to do is find the right tree. The only person who goes deep into the woods is Daryl so maybe he can find one for us." Maggie saw the cautious look of Jesus`s face. "What?"

       "I was talking about finding a real Christmas tree the other day and asked if he had seen any. All I got was a dirty look and a growl and he told me to go find my own damn fucking tree. I didn`t mention it again and I would advise you not to."

       "What the hell is he some kind of Grinch?" Carol asked.

       Maggie was getting genuinely angry. "We haven`t celebrated Christmas since this whole thing began and I don`t need Daryl Dixon`s attitude problem." She took the poinsettias and headed in the direction of the parlor as Bertie and Eduardo went back upstairs.

        "I think it`s more than just an attitude problem," Jesus quietly said to Carol and Michonne.

                                                                       *****

Hilltop`s gate opened to let Daryl back inside after his walk around the outside of the fence. Rick was on sentry duty. "How`s it look out there?" he asked.

        "Walkers are all froze up," Daryl said. "Ain`t nobody else around. Might snow hard tonight."

        "Cold as hell up here. The wind is wicked," Rick said.

        Maisie, who was on the other sentry post said, "I hope it isn`t like this five days from now."

        Daryl glanced at Rick who only shrugged then headed for Barrington House and found Jesus sorting through ornaments in the parlor. Jesus looked up at him. "I think we should shack up in the greenhouse for the winter. It`s the warmest place on Hilltop."

        Daryl emitted one of his dismissive hisses. "All I`d do is sneeze. They grow lilies and I`m allergic to 'em."

        "Noted. No lilies for Daryl Dixon."

        Daryl took off his coat and hung it over the back of a chair and set his crossbow aside "Damn poinsettias, too." He saw one in the corner and sneezed.

        "I did see something quite beautiful. Reminded me of one of the better things about the group home. One of the residents had a Christmas cactus she kept in the basement where I practiced my kata. It bloomed every Christmas, something I always looked forward to. There`s one in the greenhouse now, in the dark corner. Looks like it`s getting ready to bloom."

        The sides of Daryl`s mouth twitched as if he wanted to smile but just couldn`t. "All this don`t concern me none. I got sentry duty and perimeter walk. Someone`s gotta keep watch." Daryl plopped down on the narrow uncomfortable Victorian sofa and lounged. "There`s all that firewood that needs splittin`."

        Jesus looked at him with a somewhat sorrowful look. "I guess I`ll be helping Maggie. She is bristly these days."

        Daryl wondered if his situation might be the primary cause of Maggie`s mood. "She`s got her reason."

        Jesus suspected what Daryl was thinking but thought best not to mention it. "She wants to get everything just right for everyone. We need this celebration."

       "I don`t."

       "What does that mean?"

       "No meanin` to it. I just don`t."

       Jesus stopped what he was doing and sat beside him. "You know, I`m going to take the risk of you biting my head off, kicking me in the balls, and tossing me over the fence. Of course, if you do try any of that stuff I`ll have to demonstrate some black belt techniques."

      "Cut the bullshit and say what ya wanna say, Paul."

      "Every time someone mentions Christmas you go into this mood. I`m not talking about one of your usual growling moods, I`m used to those. What is it?"

      Daryl sighed and looked around the room, trying to find the right words. He decided there weren`t any. "I hate Christmas that`s all. Never no Santa Claus at the Dixon house, shit like that."

      "You mean to tell me you`ve never gotten a Christmas present? Ever?"

      "That`s what I`m telling ya, man."

      "You ever give anyone a Christmas present?"

      "Nope. Why?"

      Jesus shrugged. "Nothing really. Just curious."

      "You lookin` for one for your birthday or somethin`?" Daryl asked jokingly.

      Jesus quickly looked away from him for a moment as if he was trying to hide some kind of secret, then he looked back at him. "Ha-ha, very funny. And the answer is--no." Jesus playfully hit him across the chest. "I`m going to have to get everyone around here to stop calling me Jesus."

                                                  *****

        Maggie sat in her office nursing a mug of coffee as Carol and Michonne untangled more light strings. She drummed her fingers with frustration on her desk. "I really wish we had a Christmas tree," she finally said.

        "There`s that ugly fake one in the attic," Carol said.

        "I want a real one. I want the smell along with the look. Daddy used to grow a few just for use as a Christmas tree. And some real evergreen to make some wreaths and garlands." 

        Outside the doorway and out of sight they didn`t see Daryl standing there and listening.

        "There are lots of evergreen trees in the woods," Michonne said. "One of them should be okay."

        "I`ve seen a lot of them. They are lopsided, missing branches, or have dead walker guts draped over them," Maggie said.

        Carol laughed at the image it conjured in her mind. "Haven`t you heard? It`s the new trend for this year." Maggie and Michonne both laughed.

        "I just want this Christmas to be special that`s all. Not so much for me, but for the people here and especially the children." Maggie got up. "I think I`ll sort through some more boxes. Want to join me?"

        "No more light strings, please," Michonne said.

        Daryl ducked back out of sight as they walked by and disappeared into the parlor. He put on his coat and draped his crossbow over his back. Outside he went into the tool shed and grabbed the long handled ax.

        "Where are you going with that?" Rick asked as Daryl came up to the gate.

        "Lookin` for firewood." The gate opened and Daryl left. Rick watched him until he disappeared into the woods.

        "You don`t seem too enthused about this Christmas thing," Maisie said. "Bad memories?"

        "Good memories. But only memories," Rick replied. He lifted up the scope of his assault rifle to cover the tears that welled up in his eyes.

                                                                       *****

        That evening as Jesus carried a box from the attic he followed Maggie through the foyer towards the parlor.

        "So I won`t get my real tree this year," Maggie said. "Is that the top or the bottom?"

        "Top, I think. It looked pretty dusty. I hope it`s not falling apart," Jesus said.

        Maggie opened the double French doors and flipped on the crystal chandelier that hung in the center. She gasped in astonishment. In the corner was a perfect nine-foot Virginia pine tree standing straight in the stand. The scent of it wafted completely around the room. Beside it were several branches of various evergreens--some red berries, ivy, and holly. "How--?" She couldn`t finish her question. "Where--?"

        Jesus set the heavy box down. He went over and inspected it. "This is fresh cut." He took a deep breath. "Oh, that`s wonderful."

        Carol came into the parlor. "Did you find the artificial tree?"

        Maggie turned to face her, a huge grin of delight on her face. "We won`t be needing it. Someone must have finally gone out and cut one down and set it up."

        They heard footsteps and Daryl came in carrying several logs of firewood, some kindling, and some sticks.

        "Want these by the fireplace or in the corner?" he asked.

        "The corner`s occupied," Maggie said. "What do you think of our tree?"

        Daryl glanced at it as he went over to the fireplace. "Just a damn tree. I`ll get some more wood." Without another word he left.

        Maggie sighed in frustration. "His attitude is all wrong, not only for the Christmas celebration but maybe even for this place."

        There was a long silence from the other three. It was Jesus who broke it. "His family never celebrated Christmas. He`s trying not to step on anybody`s toes over this. He`s holding his tongue. A lot."

        "I`m sorry," Maggie said. "I shouldn`t have said that. Some of the people who refuse to accept Daryl being back here talked to me this morning. They threatened to leave if I decided he could stay."

        "They`re idiots," Carol said. "Let them leave."

        Maggie nodded. "Yes, I suppose they are."

        "Is he planning on coming to the celebration?" Michonne asked.

        "No," Maggie replied softly. "He signed up for sentry duty during that time. Him and Rick."

        Jesus frowned. "I guess that makes two who aren`t in the Christmas spirit." As he was saying this Daryl came in with another load of firewood.

        "It`s awful how the holidays have fallen by the wayside," Maggie said trying to get everyone`s spirits back up. "We should just keep the best ones."

        "I just wish we had some turkey for Christmas dinner," Carol said. "We have everything else. Ms. Maitlin told me the other day that she, Bertie, and I together could put down a real feast if we had turkeys and some fresh ham."

        "Daddy used to make the best ham," Maggie said. "I`ve never forgotten his recipe. But we don`t dare slaughter another pig." There was a loud bang as Daryl dropped the firewood and left the parlor without saying anything. Maggie looked at Jesus and sighed.

        "Give him his space," Jesus said with a slight warning tone. "Don`t make things worse. I know you didn`t mean what you just said." 

        "Okay," Maggie said. "Thanks."

                                                                       *****

"All this bullshit!" Daryl yelled and threw an empty bullet case at a stack of videos knocking them over as he paced around the library. Rick, who just got off of sentry duty, and Jesus ducked even though they were way out of Daryl`s trajectory. "I wish the damn walkers weren`t all froze up. Maybe I`ll go out and get `em anyway."

        "What brought this on?" Rick asked.

        "Nothin` you would understand," Daryl replied.

        "Try us," Jesus said.

       Daryl glared at Jesus. "One thing about the fall of the fuckin` world. No holiday bullshit."

       "Won`t disagree with that," Rick said smiling slightly.

       Daryl grabbed his coat. "I got sentry duty."

       "Didn`t you forget something?" Jesus asked softly.

       Daryl stood there for a moment trying to calm down. "Yeah. I`m sorry." He and Jesus embraced and kissed.

       "When is your shift over?" Jesus asked.

       "About midnight." He gently fingered Jesus`s shirt. "We need some real lovin` time don`t we?"

       "Yeah, we do." They kissed again. "See you around midnight, tiger. I`ll be waiting in the parlor." Jesus licked his lips in anticipation as he watched Daryl leave.

       "You two seem to be getting serious," Rick said. 

       "It`s partially your fault, you know."

       "My fault?"

       "In the car on the way back from our first meeting. I was conscious the whole time."

       "You little faker," Rick finally said after a pause.

       "To quote our dear Ezekiel, 'fake it 'til you make it, baby'."

                                                                       *****

Daryl must have been at the sentry post for over an hour when he heard something stir in the darkness in the direction of the woods.

       "A walker?" Shapiro, the other sentry for the night, asked.

       "Nah," Daryl said. He peered through the scope of his crossbow and discerned by the noises that it was an animal about the size of a large dog. In the dimness of the torches he was able to glimpse a head before taking aim and shooting it. There was a squeal then silence. "A pig."

       "Pig? At night?"

       "Feral hogs can become nocturnal," Daryl said.

       "I`ll take your word for it."

       As soon as Daryl got off duty he went outside the gate to retrieve the dead pig and took it over to the slaughterhouse to have it drained. Jesus was waiting up for him when he entered the parlor.

       "Shot a feral hog while on watch," Daryl said.

       "Maggie will get her ham. She`ll be pleased about that." He helped Daryl off with his coat.

       "Warmer in here than usual," Daryl said as their arms went around each other. 

       "The fireplace has been going all day with all the decorating. As you can see I removed the poinsettias."

       Daryl`s reply was a kiss and they soon had their clothes off and were naked underneath the covers. Warm and forgetting their troubles they were able to immerse themselves into their passion. Jesus wrapped his legs around Daryl, who was on the bottom, and always finding their sessions with the frottage the most arousing they were soon laughing at the mess they had made.

       "I was all froze up when I came in. I ain`t now," Daryl said.

       "Your feet are still cold. I`ll have to look for some wool socks for you. I want you warm from top to bottom."

       Jesus climbed off of Daryl and they laid side by side just cuddling, caressing, and kissing as they talked.

       "I hope ya ain`t too upset," Daryl said.

      "Upset about what?"

      "That I won`t be at the gatherin`."

      "To be honest I wish there was a way I could get out of it. I hated Christmas at the group home." Jesus looked away for a moment. "For a lot of reasons."

      "At least ya had one. Merle and I never talked about how our friends had toys and games while we had nothin`." Daryl reached over and lit up a cigarette.

       Jesus reached over and wiped away a lone tear from is lover`s eye. "I can`t imagine how much that must have hurt. Nothing is worse than seeing the hurt on a child`s face." He gathered Daryl into his arms. "If you want to drift away from Christmas, that`s okay. As long as you don`t drift away from me."

       "Never told this stuff to no one else. I don`t wanna drift away from ya, Paul."

       Jesus reached over and caressed Daryl cheek enjoying the sensation of Daryl`s soft sparse beard. "Maggie told me she`ll be reaching a decision soon. If she says you can stay you can live with me." Jesus paused. "Unless that makes you feel too uncomfortable."

       Daryl shook his head. "It don`t. I like the idea."

      Jesus smiled and playfully nibbled on one of Daryl`s nipples. "I don`t want anyone else."

      "Good." Daryl wrapped his leg around him and they kissed. "Your feet are cold, too."

      "Okay. So I look for two pairs of wool socks."

                                                                       *****

"With these four ovens we should be able to get this dinner cooked just right," Ms. Maitlin said to Carol and Bertie in the kitchen.

       "Were you surprised to find the three turkeys and the pheasant this morning?" Carol asked.

       "Couldn`t believe my eyes when I went to the smokehouse to cut up that hog and there they were, all plucked and getting that hickory smoked flavor just right. Along with my seasonings we`ll have a damn good feast. Whoever put them out there knew what he was doing. Even put some fresh hickory logs down," Ms. Maitlin said

       "Probably one of the hunters," Bertie said. Maggie entered the kitchen carrying a piece of paper.

       Ms. Maitlin emitted an impatient snort. "Not all of them know their stuff. Keep using buckshot to shoot the damn birds. These birds were clean. There`s only one person at Hilltop who hunts like that." She opened one of the ovens and began scrubbing out the ashes.

       "What are you talking about?" Maggie asked.

       "We found three turkeys and a pheasant in the smokehouse this morning," Carol said.

       "They weren`t there last night," Bertie said as she scrubbed out the ashes from the another oven.

       "You`re joking right?" Maggie asked, astonished.

       "Wouldn`t joke about nothing like that," Ms. Maitlin said. She stood up. "These ovens are as clean as they`re gonna get. Good thing I know how to use a wood burning stove. This dinner is gonna be made the old fashioned way. That milk should be ready to churn."

       "I got it," Bertie said and went over to the churn in the corner to do the small chore.

       "Freshly churned butter. I can taste it already," Maggie said.

       "Ready to be spread on homemade potato rolls," Carol said.

       "We`re gonna have a fine Christmas dinner," Ms. Maitlin said as she dug out some large roasting pans in order to clean them.

       "You ever find out who brought the Christmas tree and the evergreens?" Carol asked.

       "Nope. Nobody has fessed up," Maggie said. "A bunch of us will get together and decorate the tree and put the wreaths and garlands together today. Jesus even found some old C7 light sets, multicolored and clear. We`ll be decorating the outside of the house, too."

       "That`ll look just like it should," Ms. Maitlin said. "I`ll need someone to bring in firewood. Carol, Bertie, and I will do most of the cooking. I need to bake those pies yet." She sighed. "Haven`t fixed this much for so many people in a long time."

       Maggie set the piece of paper on the table. "This is an inventory of what we got in the cellar."

       "We need to use a lot of that up," Ms. Maitlin said as she glanced at it. She looked around the kitchen. "Whoever originally built this house must have had quite a staff. This kitchen was made for big dinners. We could use an extra hand, especially when we bake and decorate the Christmas cookies with the children tomorrow."

       "I`ll send in Jesus. He was complaining about how bored he was this morning," Maggie said.

       Ms. Maitlin laughed. "We`ll get him cured of that won`t we, ladies?"

       "We sure will," Bertie said.

       "We`ll treat him just like a little kid who says he`s bored," Carol said with amusement.

       "Speaking of the devil," Maggie said as Jesus came into the kitchen.

       "My horns and cloven hooves must be showing again," Jesus quipped.

       "Put on that apron. You`re our new assistant," Ms. Maitlin said.

       Jesus sighed. "Who told?" He looked directly at Maggie.

       "Stop telling everybody you`re bored," Maggie said. "Daryl around? We need some firewood for the stove."

       "He was cleaning his crossbow bolts. He said he`d been hunting with it. Damn redneck," Jesus said lightly as he put on the apron.

       The others all laughed.

       "Did you say he`d been out hunting?" Carol asked.

       "Yeah. Didn`t bring anything back. Anyway I don`t think he did. Why?"

       "Nothing." Carol exchanged looks with Bertie and Ms. Maitlin.

       "My husband Caleb, God rest his soul, was a redneck," Ms. Maitlin said. "Had the worst time keeping the house clean. He sure knew his stuff, especially when it came to hunting fowl."

                                                                        *****

        The mouthwatering smells of pies being baked greeted Daryl as he started to bring in loads of firewood. Outside was a small wagon full of logs and kindling as snow flurries blew some snowflakes through the open doorway. He snickered when he saw Jesus with his hair up in a ratty bun wearing a chef`s apron covered with cooking stains.

        "What are you laughing at?" Jesus asked. "You know, I could wear just this apron and nothing else."

        "Ya`d still look ridiculous. Like ya did with just wearing the lobster bib."

        There were some ooh`s and ah`s from the assembled women.

        "And you`d still go to bed with me."

        "Whoa, it`s getting hot in here now," Carol said.

        "Keep that bawdy talk down, boys. You`re distracting the girls," Ms. Maitlin said as she exchanged winks with Carol and Bertie. 

        "Or go get a room," Bertie said.

        "Oh, come on, Betty, you know you enjoy our bawdy talk," Jesus said. "Why do you keep telling those dirty jokes all the time?" 

        "Because I like to see Daryl blush and I think you`re cute as a button, Paul," Ms. Maitlin replied pursing her lips at him. Carol and Bertie could only stand there laughing.

        Daryl pretended to ignore them and stacked more firewood. When he looked up he saw Ms. Maitlin simply staring at him.

        "Girls, would you go down to the cellar and get that celery and bread loaves? I want to start drying the bread for the dressing," Ms. Maitlin said.

        "Sure," Bertie said.

        "Smile, Daryl, your face won`t crack," Carol said on her way out as they left the kitchen.

        Ms. Maitlin approached Daryl her gaze unwavering. "It was you, wasn`t it?"

        "Don`t know what ya mean."

        She shook her finger at him. "You can fool the others, but you can`t fool me. I was married to a redneck. You`re the only one who knows how to hunt without using buckshot. Don`t lie to me now, Daryl Dixon."

        Daryl hesitated, looked down, and shook his head. "Yeah." He shrugged. "Saw them turkeys and pheasant in the woods. We gotta eat, right?" He noticed Jesus looking at him and biting his lip.

        "Right." Ms. Maitlin leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Why don`t you sit down for a while. Have some fresh hot coffee. You look cold."

        Daryl set down the load of firewood and Ms. Maitlin helped him off with his coat. She guided him over to the table and pulled out a chair. Moments later there was a mug of freshly brewed coffee and a cinnamon roll in front of him. "Thanks." Daryl felt arms coming from behind him and embracing him.

        "My angel," Jesus said. "That was real sweet of you." He kissed the back of Daryl`s neck, getting flour all over him in the process. Daryl could only sit there in silence as he took a deep breath.

        "Here, have a smoke," Ms. Maitlin said as she pointed to the pack of Morley`s on the table. She struck a long match to ignite firewood in the stove then lit the cigarette for him. Jesus was still hugging Daryl. "Get busy with that pie dough. You still have to mix the dough for the pumpkin and zucchini breads and dig out and clean those cookie sheets."

        "Yes, ma`am." Jesus sighed and let Daryl go. "All this for slave wages." He vigorously rolled the pie dough on the counter.

       A couple minutes passed and Daryl watched him with amusement, coolly blowing out the smoke from his lungs. "Still bored?"

       "Shut up," Jesus said evenly without turning around.

                                                                       *****

        "How is it out there?" Maggie asked Rick as he and Maisie came into the parlor that night blowing on their hands.

        "Wind has picked up a lot. The clouds are thickening and so is the snow," Rick said.

        "A winter where it won`t stop snowing. Haven`t seen one of these in a long time," Maggie said.

        "We got the vehicles covered," Maisie said as she sat down to join the other residents of Hilltop who were busy making wreaths and garlands. Jesus and Michonne were stringing lights on the tree. 

        "Wind chill must be way below zero," Rick said. "Everybody needs to exercise a lot of caution and bundle up."

        "Maybe we should call the sentries in," Jesus said. "We have the trip wires in place if anyone wants to risk an attack in this weather."

        "Good idea," Maggie said.

        "Can you manage?" Jesus asked Michonne who nodded. "I`ll go get them."

        About ten minutes later Jesus came back in followed by the four people who had sentry duty. Daryl was one of them and he immediately went over to the fire and stood beside Rick to warm himself. Jesus brought them some mugs of hot chocolate. 

        "Ain`t a fit night out for man nor beast," Maggie said.

        "And you`re both," Jesus whispered loudly to Daryl, his tone flirtatious. 

        "I`ll have ya screamin` like a banshee tonight," Daryl said licking his lips.

        "Crazy lovebirds," Rick said and got a hard nudge from Daryl.

        "More or that bawdy talk, boys?" Ms. Maitlin, who overheard them, said in a loud voice. The others in the room burst into laughter. "I got a Christmas dirty joke. Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack?"

        "I don`t know. Why?" Maggie asked.

        "Because he only comes once a year." The entire room burst into laughter. Daryl just rolled his eyes.

        "But I always have a second coming," Jesus said as he rejoined Michonne at the Christmas tree. There was a round of groans.

        "I`m glad the children are with Carol and Bertie in my office stringing berries," Maggie said.

        "Here`s one for the bawdy boyfriends. What is a gay man`s favorite dessert on a hot day? Ass cream cones."

        "Now I`m never going to get that image out of my head," Jesus said. He looked over at Daryl who was hiding his face. "I think you just made Daryl blush again, Betty."

        "And here I`ve heard some pretty vulgar stuff come out of your mouth, Daryl," Ms. Maitlin said.

        "Mixed company," Rick said nudging Daryl.

        "Stop." Daryl lightly kicked Rick in the shin.

        An alarm went off in the kitchen and Ms. Maitlin got up. "That must be the pies." She left the room.

        "Than woman can be exasperating at times," Jesus said. He clipped on the last light. "There. Now I need to find an extension cord. I think I have a couple in my trailer."

        Maggie got up and went over to Daryl and Rick. "You want to help us with the evergreens?"

        "Nah," Daryl said.

        "Not really." Rick looked away from her.

        "Alright, have it your way." She gazed at them worriedly and exchanged looks with Jesus and Michonne.

         "I`m gonna warm up in the kitchen. Bring ya some more firewood in a bit." Daryl finished his hot chocolate then glanced at the tree. "Don`t let that get too dry. Sucks up water like a son-of-a-bitch." He then left.

        "Relax, Rick," Michonne said coming over to him and squeezing his arm.

        "I think I`ll give Daryl a hand." He gazed at the Christmas tree which already had a few ornaments on it.

        "It`s hard, but we do have to move on. Somehow," Michonne said following his gaze.

        "I know. I just ain`t quite ready yet." Rick left the room. Michonne sighed then went back over to the tree.

        Daryl heard music coming from the kitchen and Ms. Maitlin was setting out the freshly baked pies and preparing to put out muffin pans for tomorrow`s breakfast. He sat down at the table still shivering, his hand shaking as he lit up a cigarette. "What music is that?"

        "It`s called  _If I Should Fall From Grace With God_ by an Irish band called The Pogues. My maiden name was Kavanagh. Can`t get more Irish than that." Ms. Maitlin stared at him for a moment. "You need to slow down."  

        "Nah, I`m good." Daryl noticed Rick enter the kitchen.

        "Caleb was a lot like you. Always had to be out doing something. Always tinkering. If he hadn`t got bit, he would have died of overwork."

        "Sorry about your husband," Rick said quietly.

        "I had to put him down when he turned." Ms. Maitlin closed her eyes. "Our son had moved away years before. I often wonder if he`s still alive out there somewhere." She started to put batter in the muffin pans. They watched, not saying a word until she was done, put them in the oven, and set the timer. She sat down across from them at the table and lit up a cigarette looking at Daryl. "You know, I really get a kick out of you and Paul. You got something real nice going."

        "I like to think so."

        "You wanna be with him?"

        Daryl nodded. "I don`t think I can live without him no more."

        "I`m sure Maggie is convinced that you need to stay at Hilltop," Rick said.

        Daryl shrugged exhaling a long string of smoke. "I ain`t so sure."

        "You`re part of us now whether you think so or not," Ms. Maitlin said.

        Daryl looked at her, then at Rick. He knew he needed a haven to stay at if he was to survive. The winter was harsher than anyone had ever expected and even he wasn`t sure if he could survive under the circumstances. More than anything he wanted to be with Paul. He stubbed out his cigarette and stood up. "Let`s go get some more firewood."

        Daryl and Rick left the kitchen and heard the singing of Christmas carols coming from the parlor. Jesus was standing just outside the doors holding a couple extension cords and singing  _Angels We Have Hear On High_ to himself. Daryl embraced him from behind in a tight hug and Jesus just seemed to melt in his lover`s strong arms as he closed his eyes. They stood there in that position for the longest time, lost in their own world then exchanged a long passionate kiss as Daryl rocked Jesus.

        "I went to the trailer to get the extension cords and it`s freezing in there," Jesus said. "Eduardo told me if we could salvage some parts the central heat could be fixed, but not until this weather thaws."

        "That means more nights on the parlor floor. Better than a tent."

        Jesus laughed. "Yeah, you`re right about that. The fireplace is quite romantic don`t you think?"

        Daryl hissed and grinned slightly. "That damn romance stuff. We know how to get real cozy."

        "Never saw that as a problem." They kissed again and Daryl let him go back into the parlor as Jesus took up his song again. Rick and Daryl headed for the front door.

        Daryl glanced at Rick who had a shit-eating grin on his face. "What."

        "Never saw you as the romantic type," Rick said.

        "Never said I was."

        "Cozy fireplace. Kissing and hugging all the time. You`re as bad as those romance novels you hate."

        "If ya don`t shut up I`ll put another choke hold on ya."

        "Still illegal, asshole," Rick said as he opened the front door and a blast of snow nearly knocked them over.

                                                                        *****

        That next day the snow had let up and everyone was finishing up decorating the outside and inside of Barrington House which had been transformed into a Christmas fantasy. Some people began to set up tables in the library, Maggie`s office, the foyer, and eventually the parlor in order to accommodate everyone. The children would later be in the kitchen baking and decorating the promised sugar Christmas cookies with Ms. Maitlin, Carol, Bertie, and Jesus.

        "This looks fantastic," Michonne said as she admired the evergreen and berry decorations along the railing of the staircase, which were lit up with clear twinkle lights.

        "We got all this done yesterday. We`ll finish up outside and in the parlor today," Maggie said after greeting everyone. They headed for the parlor and before opening the door she shouted, "Wait!" Maggie took out the extra skeleton key and opened the doors slightly and peered inside.

        "Hey!" Jesus exclaimed.

        "Hey yourself. Will you two get your clothes on? We need to finish up in here."

        "Shit," Daryl said and reached over and grabbed his pants.

        Maggie closed the door. "It`ll be a couple minutes. The bawdy boyfriends aren`t quite ready for public viewing."

        "Those two are inseparable, " Michonne observed.

        Moments later a slightly disheveled Daryl and Jesus emerged from the parlor now fully clothed. Their arms were full of blankets, pillows, and sleeping bags.

        "We`ll put these in the storeroom and come back for the mattress," Jesus said a bit sheepishly. "Hi, everyone."

        There was a round of 'hellos' and 'good morning`s' woven through titters of laughter.

        "Deck them halls," Daryl said in a smart-ass tone as he followed Jesus out.

        "Go right on in. All you have to do are the garlands and wreaths," Maggie said. "Then later we`ll start putting together centerpieces for the tables. 

        "I should deck you," she heard Jesus say to Daryl as they disappeared into the kitchen.

                                                                       *****

        Daryl and Eduardo had spent the day splitting firewood and delivering it to Barrington House as the Christmas decorating continued. Maisie decided to give them a hand and she and Daryl were now trudging towards the house as Jerry, Father Gabriel, Siddiq, Dwight, Rosita, Tara, and Cal were stringing lights and putting up garlands.

        "We need to scavenge snow mobiles," Maisie said.

       "Nobody`s goin` nowhere. Gonna snow some more," Daryl said. "Parlor will be warm, so Paul and me will get some sleep."

       "You actually sleep?" Maisie asked grinning.

       "A little." Daryl smirked at her.

       They went into the house, Jesus holding the door open for them. He quickly closed it to keep the heat inside. "Maggie wants to see us in her office this afternoon."

       Daryl set the firewood down on a nearby stack. "Did she say why?" There was reluctance in his voice.

       "No. Only that she wants you, me, and Rick."

       Daryl nodded. "I`m gonna get that sack of pine-cones." He opened the door and went back outside.

       Jesus stood in the doorway and watched him, a worried look on his face. He had a feeling that Maggie had made her decision. He slowly closed the door.

       "Do you think she`ll tell him he can stay?" Maisie asked.

       Jesus shrugged. "I don`t know. Maggie`s got a great poker face."

       Later that day after eating lunch Daryl, Rick, and Jesus went in to see Maggie. Rick closed the door slightly, leaving it cracked open a couple inches. There was an awkward silence, then Maggie cleared her throat. "I just wanted you to know I`ve made my decision." She paused. "Daryl, you can stay."

        Jesus covered his mouth with both hands, feeling tears of joy well up in his eyes.

       "I think that`s the right decision," Rick said.

       "I know how to earn my keep. Huntin`. Fishin`. Choppin` wood, workin` on the cars. Protectin` this place. I`m real sorry about what happened. I don`t wanna kill nobody here."

       "I know. Like Dwight said. It was the heat of the moment," Maggie said.

       "What made you decide?" Rick asked.

       "I`ve been observing, talking to people. I`ve known Daryl for a long time. I also know that we have times when we just crack under the pressure," Maggie said.

       "I need to say something," Jesus said as he came up beside Daryl and they put their arms around each other`s waists. "I can no longer stand being apart from Daryl. If he had been asked to leave here, I would have gone with him." They gazed into each other`s eyes.

        "I know how much you two love each other," Maggie said. Daryl and Jesus exchanged a kiss.

        "Hello," a tiny voice said as the door was pushed open further. Judith stepped into the office all covered with flour and frosting stuck to her dress.

        "Hey, what are you doing here?" Rick asked. "You`re supposed to be making cookies."

        "Uncle Daryl and Uncle Paul were kissing."

        "Yes they were," Rick said picking her up.

        "Why?" Judith asked.

        "Because they love each other like Michonne and I love each other," Rick said. "Come on, let`s go see if I can sneak a cookie." He set her down and held her hand as they walked out. Judith waved to Daryl and Jesus.

        "Looks like you got a president for your fan club," Maggie said.

        "The first time she called me Uncle Paul I about flipped," Jesus said. "Well, I better move my ass. KP duty under Ms. Betty Maitlin is comparable to that of a Marine drill sergeant."

        "Yeah, move it, Gomer," Daryl said, earning him a whack on his ass.

        After Jesus had left Maggie and Daryl looked at each other for a long time.

        "I know you`re having a hard time right now," Maggie said softly. "I also know you`re trying."

         Daryl shrugged. "I`m good." He paused. "Thanks for letting me stay." He left the office.

                                                                        *****

When Rick came upstairs to put Judith down for a nap he found Michonne folding and putting away some clean clothes. Judith, still covered with the remnants of making cookies, was already asleep so he put her in the crib and covered her up.

         "Maggie says Daryl can stay," Rick said in a hushed tone.

         Michonne smiled. "Glad to hear it."

         "I thought you were downstairs Christmas decorating."

         "I was avoiding this particular chore and decided I couldn`t avoid it anymore." She opened the closet and hung up some shirts.

         "I`m sorry if I`m just not getting into this whole thing," Rick said as he helped her. The heaviness in his voice was undeniable.

         "I know. It keeps me busy. I used to do Christmas before all this. Only had two with Andre. Then things moved so fast," Michonne said sadly.

         Rick sat down on the edge of the bed. "Lori, Carl, and I would decorate the house like crazy. Invite Shane over and a couple cousins. When Carl was real little he would grab the first present with his name on it and just rip it open. He would-." Rick stopped as he broke down in tears. "I can`t, Michonne. I can`t do this anymore."

         Michonne dropped the clothes in her hands on the bed and knelt down in front of him and grasped his hands. "Yes, you can. See that little girl over there? She`s real excited."

         Rick nodded. "Yeah. I watched her decorating those cookies with the other children. You should have seen the look on her face. She`s asked me to find presents for Uncle Daryl and Uncle Paul. How do I explain things to her, Michonne?"

         "You don`t." Michonne got up and opened a drawer and took out a box. "Remember finding this and what`s in it?"

         "Yeah."

         "We know someone who needs it. It can be to Daryl from the three of us. He`s someone who`s never had a Christmas. Dwight and the others brought back a lot of things. I`ll find something for Jesus I`m sure." She set the box aside. "I`ll wrap this up as soon as I`m done here."

         Rick recovered his composure. "How--how do you do this, Michonne?"

        "I just do." She leaned over and kissed his lips. "Be there for Judith. She`s never known Christmas, either, until now."

        "You`re right." He paused. "Alright. I can do it for her. I will do it for her." The determination was strong in his voice.

        They embraced for a long time, parting when they heard a loud noise from the other side of the set of closed pocket doors that separated their room, which was a former sitting room, from the bedroom on the other side.

        "Ms. Maitlin must have lost her cookbook again," Michonne said laughing.

        "Can`t have her doing that. She`s in charge of Christmas dinner."

                                                          ***          *          ***

**ACT 4**

 

         Jesus, Bertie, and Carol had left to go to the root cellar to get more ingredients so Maggie and Ms. Maitlin were able to talk alone in the kitchen later that afternoon as they sorted through the cookies.

        "Those boys not having a place to live in this freezing weather has got me worried," Ms. Maitlin said to her. "Daryl tells me the entire central heat in Paul`s trailer needs to be replaced and salvaging another will have to wait until spring."

        "I know they can`t spend the entire winter on the parlor floor. This house is drafty and they need privacy," Maggie said.

        "I`ve been thinking of a change for me. You know that room we use for storage just off the back door? That`s the housekeeper`s bedroom from the old days. I don`t need a bedroom upstairs and I want to be closer to the kitchen. Move all that crap out of there and I`ll move into that room. Give those boys my room. It has a queen-size bed. They can stay there until Paul`s trailer gets fixed up. Then you can move someone else into that bedroom."

        "That`s the one connected to where Rick, Michonne, and Judith live, right?" Maggie asked. Ms. Maitlin nodded. "That`s real generous of you."

        "I guess it`s kind of my Christmas present to them. It has its own fireplace, too." She handed Maggie the skeleton key. "Send someone to get my things, there ain`t much."

        "I`ll go ask a couple people to clear out, clean, and furnish the storeroom. I know you`re too busy in here. Don`t you worry about a thing. And this works out in another way, too. I told Daryl he can stay. He and Jesus will be living together." Maggie closed the last bag of cookies.

        "Oh, that`s music to my ears. I`m quite fond of both of them. Don`t tell them about it yet."

        Jesus, Bertie, and Carol entered the kitchen carrying some baskets of vegetables. Jesus noticed the unusual looks on both Ms. Maitlin`s and Maggie`s faces. "Did I miss something?" he asked.

       "We were just putting away cookies," Maggie said. "Well, I best get busy on that project." She left the kitchen in a hurry.

       "Something`s going on," Carol said. "She always acts that way when she`s got a big secret."

       "Do you know what it is?" Jesus asked Ms. Maitlin.

       "If I did I wouldn`t tell you."

       The rear door opened and Daryl came in with an armload of firewood. "Finally got it all split," he said. Then he looked at the others. "What`s goin` on?" 

       "She won`t tell us," Jesus said as he set his basket down and nodded towards Ms. Maitlin. "And Maggie is in one of her secretive moods."          

       Daryl grunted and shook his head.

                                                                       *****

"Oh, that looks perfect," Maggie said as she watched Shapiro and Dwight hang a mirror above the fireplace. It had been found in the attic. 

       "Is Daryl still bound and determined not to come to the Christmas get-together?" Dwight asked.

       "You know how stubborn he can be," Maggie said.

       "Let me talk to him," Dwight said.

       Wesley emerged from the hallway. "You want me to put those clean sheets on the bed?"

       "Yeah," Maggie said. "We also need to go over to Jesus`s trailer and move his and Daryl`s things over here."

       "Are you sure Daryl hasn`t attached an alarm of some kind to his crossbow?" Shapiro asked as he followed Maggie out.

       "Don`t worry, I`m making sure no one spills the beans on this surprise."

                                                                       *****

       Dwight helped Daryl as they stacked firewood under the canopy behind Barrington House as snow flurries blew around them and the wind began to pick up some more.

       "Glad I got all this shit split," Daryl said trying to make conversation. "Hate doin` it when it`s a blizzard comin`."

       Dwight stared at the sky a look of concern on his face. He set a particularly heavy log on the stack. "This reminds me of my grandpa. He had this big ole fireplace and always had it going during the holidays. From Thanksgiving right into New Year`s Day. They lived in the mountains in the northern part of Pennsylvania, so got snow in the winter. You`ve never been out of the state of Georgia before coming here, right?"

       Daryl wasn`t sure why Dwight was telling him about his background. Then he remembered Paul telling him he needed to listen more to people, including Dwight. He shrugged. "No place to go. No relatives wanted my brother and me around--for a lot of reasons." He certainly wasn`t going to open up about his history with Dwight.

       "Can`t choose our relatives whether we like them or not. There were a few in my family I wanted to push over a high cliff." Dwight couldn`t help notice how sad Daryl looked whenever Maggie`s Christmas celebration was mentioned. "I`m sorry. I can`t imagine anyone who never celebrates holidays."

       "A lot of bullshit goin` on anyway."

       Dwight laughed. "My folks would go nuts trying to buy Christmas presents for everyone." He paused. "Daryl, I can understand why you wouldn`t want to come to the Christmas celebration, but I think you should."

       "What`s it to ya?" Daryl asked the hostility in his voice intense.

       "Nothing." Dwight looked directly in his eyes matching his gaze.

       "I hate parties," Daryl finally said looking away.

       "I think this one`s different."

       "How`s that?" Daryl lit up a cigarette and offered Dwight one. Dwight took it and used his own matches to light both of them up.

       "For one thing, the people here are getting to know you better, starting to trust you again. Most of all, it would mean a lot to Jesus."

       "Paul don`t care about a lot of that shit."

       "Maybe so, but he`s gonna be there. He`ll be by himself worrying about you instead of enjoying himself."

       Daryl stared at the ground and slid his foot back and forth. He realized that Dwight had a good point. "I don`t know what to do at these things." His voice was almost inaudible.

       "You don`t have to do anything. Just sit in a corner somewhere. I hate these kind of things, too, but I`m going, if that will help."

       Daryl was silent for a long time, then nodded. "Alright. I`ll come. Won`t say I`ll stay."

       "Nobody will force you to stay. We can go get drunk in the cellar if you want. We may even start to like each other." Dwight grinned.

       Daryl emitted a short laugh. "Not likely." He glanced at the scattered logs. "Come on, I`m freezin` my ass."

                                                                       *****

        "Seriously?" Jesus asked Dwight later that day. "You talked him into coming?"

        "Wasn`t easy." Dwight leaned over and whispered "You might want to spiff him up a bit."

        "I will. I`m going to give him a haircut even if I have to tie him down to a chair." Jesus smiled. "Where is he?"

        "In the kitchen talking to Ms. Maitlin." Dwight looked around somewhat nervously. "Umm, I got something I promised Maggie I would help with, so see you later." He walked off somewhat hurriedly.

        Jesus stared after him a puzzled look on his face, then went into the kitchen where he found Daryl sitting at the table calmly smoking and drinking a mug of coffee while Ms. Maitlin was chopping some celery for the dressing. "Where`s Maggie?" Jesus asked.

        "Somewhere," Ms. Maitlin replied vaguely without turning around.

        "Why is everyone acting so mysteriously?" Jesus sat down across from Daryl and poured himself some coffee.

        "No one`s acting mysteriously," Ms. Maitlin said. "What makes you think so?"

        "Okay, weird. Dwight said he promised to help Maggie with something."

        "It is Christmas. Maybe he`s wrapping gifts," Ms. Maitlin said.

        "Man, your imagination is goin` crazy again," Daryl said.

        "It is not." Jesus ran his foot up Daryl`s leg under the table. He felt a hand squeeze his knee causing him to jump as if a bolt of electricity moved through him. "Stop that. I`m boy crazy."

        "See? Ya are some kind of crazy," Daryl said sticking his tongue out slightly. Jesus returned the flirtatious expression with a lustful look in his eye.

        Maggie appeared in the doorway. "Ms. Maitlin, we`ll need that card table and chairs from your bedroom closet."

        "Okay."

        Maggie disappeared from the doorway as fast as she had appeared.

        Ms. Maitlin turned around. "I got something I need your help with." She fingered the key to her room in the pocket of her apron.

        "Sure," Jesus said and both he and Daryl got up and followed her out. "Then on top of everything else, I can`t find the key to the storeroom. We won`t be able to get to our sleeping bags."

        "I`ll work on the lock when we get back," Daryl said. They didn`t notice the amused look on Ms. Maitlin`s face.

        In moments they were up the stairs and followed Ms. Maitlin to the door of her room. She struggled to turn the key. "The lock`s a bit rusty, could use some oil." They heard the lock click. "There." She opened the door and motioned for them to go in before her. Jesus went in first, Daryl was close behind him. Both were surprised to see Dwight, Maggie, Wesley, Eduardo, and Shapiro gathered inside the room.

        "Welcome to your new home," Maggie said stepping forward.

        Both Daryl and Jesus turned around and looked at Ms. Maitlin.

        "Merry Christmas, boys," she simply said and handed the key to Daryl.

        Jesus wiped tears from his eyes. Daryl looked down completely humbled by the experience, biting his lip. Maggie came over and hugged them both.

        The set of pocket doors that separated the two rooms opened and Rick and Michonne stood there with questioning looks on their faces.

        "What`s going on?" Rick asked.

        "Ms. Maitlin has given Daryl and Jesus her room and moved downstairs," Maggie said.

        "You mean we`re neighbors now?" Rick asked. Maggie nodded.

        "There goes the neighborhood," Michonne said, even causing Rick to laugh.

                                                                        *****

After the others left only Maggie, Michonne, Rick, and Ms. Maitlin remained behind. Jesus ran his hands across all the furnishings and the bed. "All of this is ours?"

        "For the time being," Maggie said. "Until your trailer is repaired in the spring."

        "That storeroom downstairs is my room now. I wanted to be nearer to the kitchen," Ms. Maitlin said.

        "Why?" Daryl asked. "We were fine on the parlor floor."

        "You were not," Maggie said. "That room is pretty drafty and you had the sniffles this morning and Jesus was coughing. You want a cold or pneumonia?"

        "Nah," Daryl said.

        Jesus put his arm around him. "We are so grateful, Ms. Maitlin. Thank you."

        "Yeah, thanks," Daryl said quietly feeling a bit awkward.

        Maggie could sense how overwhelming the situation was for them, especially Daryl. "Will we see you tonight at the Christmas Eve party?"

        "Yes, we`ll be there," Jesus said squeezing Daryl`s arm. Daryl only nodded.

        "Good." Maggie and Ms. Maitlin left.

        "These pocket doors are pretty thick," Rick said sliding one back and forth.

        "Is that a problem?" Daryl asked.

        "No. We won`t have to listen to each other`s bedroom capers," Michonne said.

        "Hi, Uncle Daryl. Hi, Uncle Paul," Judith said from her crib. "Are you gonna kiss?"

        Jesus looked at Daryl. "Well, are we?"

        "Yeah." Daryl grabbed him and they kissed.

        "Let`s leave them alone for a while," Rick said to Judith and closed the pocket doors.

        They walked over to the fireplace arm in arm. Jesus held out his hands towards the flames. "Oh, that feels wonderful." He noticed that Daryl had grown particularly quiet. "You okay?"

        "Yeah." He sat down on the bed and bounced on it. "Good mattress."

        Jesus sat down beside him. "Betty told me the queen-size bed was a reward from Gregory."

        "He`d never give us a room like this," Daryl said the contempt in his voice.

        "He didn`t even want me to have the trailer. Wanted me to put a cot up in one of the storage sheds."

        "I wish I knew how to do this Christmas thing better." 

        "Don`t worry about it. I already got what I wanted." They kissed. "For Christmas and for--." He realized he was about to say something he didn`t want revealed.

        "For Christmas and what?" Daryl asked.

        "Nothing important. You`re here with me. I don`t need anything else."

        As they embraced Daryl was sure Jesus was hiding something. He knew if he was patient he would find out eventually. Jesus had the tendency to let things slip out in times of duress.

                                                                        *****

As Carol and Bertie took party trays out of the kitchen to set on the buffet, Jesus and Ms. Maitlin prepared them at the counter. She noticed the somewhat melancholy expression on his face. 

        "What`s wrong? Don`t you like the bedroom?"

        "Huh? Oh, we love it. Why do you ask?"

        "You seem kind of sad." Ms. Maitlin had a gruff exterior to most people, however to people she liked she let them into her heart. She saw both Jesus and Daryl as adopted sons. She was also one of the few people at Hilltop who really understood the two men.

        "It has nothing to do with that. It`s Daryl. I`d like to get him something for Christmas. I have no idea what to do. I mean, the shopping around here kind of sucks. No mall."

        Ms. Maitlin laughed, appreciating Jesus`s off-the-wall sense of humor. She was silent as she went into deep thought. "I might have something. I`ll be right back." She went into what was now her room and opened the closet taking out a long gun case and bringing it into the kitchen. "This belonged to Caleb. I have no use for it." She set it on the table and opened it. Inside was a Marlin Winchester 30-30 rifle complete with a scope. There were also two boxes of ammo.

        Jesus took it out of the case and examined it. "This is magnificent. Good balance. Look at the design on the woodwork."

       "Caleb did a lot of good hunting with this. Only thing of his I was ever to keep. Killed a lot of walkers with it myself."

       "Daryl will love this. Are you sure you don`t want it? You`ve given us so much already." Jesus was again overwhelmed by her kindness and generosity.

       "I don`t have anyone except the people here and the people here have the two of you to thank for saving a lot of lives. It can be from the both of us." She squeezed his shoulder the way a mother would a beloved son.

       Jesus nodded. "Okay." He put the rifle back in the case. They hugged tightly.

       "What`s going on?" Carol asked coming in with a large tray. She saw the gun case on the table.

       Jesus held his finger up to his lips. "Daryl is getting a Christmas present."

       "My lips are sealed," Carol said winking at him. She had immediately taken a liking to Jesus and couldn`t be happier that he and Daryl had found each other.

       "You still got that punch to set out," Ms. Maitlin said. "Save all the fun until tomorrow."

                                                                        *****

        That evening almost everyone who lived at Hilltop attended. Those who knew how to play musical instruments and had them provided some live music to accompany singing or just entertaining instrumentally. The night would be topped off by Ezekiel reading 'The Night Before Christmas' to the children. Maggie was pleased, feeling the unity she wanted to achieve within the community was the boost everyone needed to forget the way of the world for a while.

        "Did you get a haircut?" Rick asked Daryl as they looked out one of the windows drinking some wine.

        "Yeah. Paul shot me with a tranquilizer dart," Daryl replied.

        "I did not. I used some karate moves and knocked him out," Jesus said.

        Rick looked around at the crowded foyer. "I guess Maggie was right about all of us needing this. I just wish--." Rick closed his eyes. "I just wish my memories weren`t so vivid."

        "Carl would have loved this," Jesus said soothingly. 

        "I sometimes imagine how he would be with Judith this time of year. Since he`s not here, I have to be here for her. Right before we came down she said 'I love Christmas, Daddy'. This is her first. I hope we will be able to have more." Rick wiped the tears from his eyes.

        "There are a lot of first Christmas`s here," Jesus said. "Not all of them children." He smiled at Daryl.

        After the party everyone went back to their trailers, rooms, or other temporary shelters. Daryl and Jesus both plopped down on the comfy overstuffed sofa in their new bedroom and put their arms around each other.

       "Tired?" Jesus asked.

       "Umhmm." Daryl closed his eyes.

       "Me, too." Jesus looked at the fireplace hypnotized by the flames. "Tomorrow is going to be a busy day. Did you have a good time tonight?"

       "Yeah, I did. Still ain`t lookin` forward to tomorrow." Daryl snuggled up to him and closed his eyes.

       "You haven`t changed your mind have you?" Jesus slowly stroked Daryl`s hair. He knew it was somewhat of an ordeal for Daryl and he would help get his lover through it.

       "Nah."

       "We can always leave if it becomes too much for you."

       Daryl opened his eyes. "Ya don`t have to leave on my account."

       "I wouldn`t want to be there without you." He kissed Daryl`s forehead. "I don`t like you to be alone when you are haunted by your past."

       Daryl closed his eyes again and sighed. "Feelin` this good makes me think somethin` is about to go wrong."

       Jesus emitted an ironic chuckle. "It does seem that way doesn`t it?" He buried himself deeper into the cushions so he could cuddle more. "I feel safe here since Maggie became our leader. Thinking about it, I never did feel safe with Gregory. I felt safer outside the fence with the walkers."

       "It was nice of Ms. Maitlin to give us her room," Daryl said as he yawned.

       "I asked her why and she only said she wanted to." Jesus noticed how sleepy Daryl was getting. "Let`s get some sleep. We`ll postpone christening our new home for now."

       "Look forward to that." Daryl stretched his neck and they kissed, then arm in arm headed over to the bed.

                                                                        *****

It had snowed during the night, but Christmas morning came with the sun shining over the snow making it sparkle like diamonds. All the residents of Hilltop met the day with smiles as they celebrated in private, the dinner would be later that afternoon. Holding hands Daryl and Jesus came downstairs to celebrate with Maggie, Rick, Michonne, Carol, Ezekiel, Dwight, Henry, Judith, Hershel, and Ms. Maitlin. Jesus bent over with pure laughter when he entered the parlor and saw Maggie wearing a tacky Christmas sweater.

       "Is the leader of Hilltop looking to be toppled?" he asked.

       "Remember finding it on one of your runs?" Maggie asked.

       "You`ll scare the walkers," Daryl said. He accepted a mug of hot chocolate from Ms. Maitlin.

       "If that`s the case, I`ll quit shooting at them." Maggie gave Daryl a hug. "You look really nice in that blue denim shirt." Daryl wore it with a pair of black pants and, of course, his vest.

       "I was dressed by the clothes horse this mornin`." He got a nudge in the ribs from Jesus. 

       "I`m trying to get you to dress better." Jesus pulled Daryl over to a table laden with a breakfast buffet and grabbed some toast, put some jelly on it, and stuffed it in his mouth.

       "Mind your manners," Daryl said as he grabbed a handful of peanuts and tossed them one by one into his mouth.

       "Speak for yourself, you silly redneck." Jesus looked at Rick. "That eggnog is spiked with moonshine, not bourbon."

       "How do you know?" Rick asked taking a sip after dipping his cup. "You`re sure in a really good mood today."

       "Daryl prepared it. Hey!" Jesus exclaimed. Daryl had reached under his shirt and tickled him. "Stop that. It`s my birthday." Jesus let out a string of giggles.

       "No it ain`t," Rick said.

       Jesus realized that in that moment he had accidentally blurted out his secret. "Yes it is. For real." The others looked at him. "I mean it. I didn`t get the nickname for my looks alone."

       "And you didn`t tell anyone?" Carol asked.

       "For obvious reasons. Please don`t tell anyone else. I don`t like the fuss." Jesus was somewhat serious.

       "We won`t, but Happy Birthday anyway," Michonne said giving Jesus a hug.

       "Thanks. Now all I want to do is eat some breakfast." After loading their plates, Daryl and Jesus sat down on the love seat near the Christmas tree where Henry was playing with Judith and young Hershel.

       "There`s a big old gun case with a red ribbon in back," Maggie said. "I couldn`t read the tag though."

       "Aren`t you a little old to be shaking Christmas presents?" Carol asked giving her a knowing look.

       "I saw you shaking the one to you from Maggie earlier," Ms. Maitlin said to Carol.

       "I`m glad to see you here," Ezekiel said to Rick.

       "Michonne pointed out to me that I needed to be here for Judith."

       "As I am here for Henry. We all had losses too close to us."

       "Here`s a tiger ornament," Henry said as he pointed to one that was an antique. "We can call it Shiva."

       "Of course we can," Ezekiel said. He had to turn away for a moment.

       "That`s quite appropriate," Carol said and leaned over and kissed Ezekiel on the cheek. After a few moments of being lost in thought he smiled at her.

       Jesus got up to get a couple more items to eat. Maggie cornered him so he wasn`t able to sit back down as they conversed. She noticed Daryl sticking his finger into the tree stand to check on the water level. In that moment it hit her as to who had cut down the tree and set it up in the parlor and brought the evergreens.

       "Why that son-of-a-bitch," she said in a pleasant voice.

       "You mad at someone?" Jesus asked

       "No, not mad. Some people just like to have little secrets that`s all." Jesus noted her expression and immediately got her meaning when he followed her gaze.

       Daryl returned to just sipping his coffee as he and Judith touched the ornaments on the tree, then pick up some of the presents and reading the names out loud to her on the tags. He saw one with his name on it and noticed that it was from Rick, Michonne, and Judith.

       "We found it on a run," Rick said kneeling next to Judith. "Why don`t you open it? You want Uncle Daryl to open it?"

       "Yeah," Judith said nodding eagerly.

       Daryl took it the uncertainty and awkwardness in his posture since all eyes were now on him. Jesus came over and sat down beside him. Daryl only sat there and stared at the brightly wrapped package in his lap.

       "Hey, it won`t hurt to at least find out what it is," Jesus said as he put a reassuring arm around Daryl`s shoulders.

       Daryl looked at him then at Rick then back at the package. He shrugged. "Yeah." He winked at Judith who was watching with eager anticipation. Slowly he took off the wrapping to reveal a long wooden box. When he opened it inside was a brand new skinning knife in its sheath.

       "I noticed yours got busted in that fight with the walkers," Rick said.

       Daryl`s bottom lip trembled slightly. "This is nice. Never got a Christmas present before."

       Jesus gathered Daryl in a tight hug as Daryl buried his head into Jesus`s chest. Jesus noticed tears in Daryl`s eyes when he looked up at him. "You need to leave the room for a minute?"

       Daryl shook his head. "Just give me a bit." Jesus massaged Daryl`s back and felt him relax. Rick rested a reassuring hand on his arm. Judith came over and laid her head on is thigh.

       "I guess since I`m wearing the tacky sweater I have to be Santa," Maggie said hoping to break the tension and started to distribute the presents, the first ones to the children.

       Everyone received something and by the time she was finished Daryl had seemed to recover. He looked over at Dwight who nodded and Daryl returned the nod.

       "Don`t forget the gun case behind the tree," Jesus said.

       Maggie reached behind the tree and read the tag. "To Daryl from Paul and Betty." She placed the case on Daryl`s lap.

       "It`s a gun case. Gotta be a gun," Daryl said and everyone laughed.

       "Good guess," Jesus said as he looked on in anticipation watching Daryl remove the ribbon and open the case. He took out the Marlin Winchester rifle and immediately marveled at its workmanship. He looked at Jesus. "It belonged to Ms. Maitlin`s husband."

       "That`s beautiful," Michonne said. "A lot of workmanship went into making that. A redneck`s gun if I ever saw one."

       Daryl met Michonne`s ornery grin with an amused gaze. He examined it in silence and peered through the scope. "This is a good piece. I`ll take it out next time I`m on watch."

       Jesus shook his head and laughed. "That means he likes it." He then leaned over. "Try not to kill a tree by accident."

       "Prick," Daryl softly said in reply.

       "Yeah, prick," Judith said.

       Rick and Michonne had 'oh shit' looks on their faces, however there were titters of laughter from all the others.

                                                                      *****

       Jesus wiped his brow from the heat of the kitchen as he assisted Ms. Maitlin, Carol, and Bertie in getting the Christmas dinner for all the residents of Hilltop ready for later that evening, the buttered casserole pans beside him ready to be filled. His arms and shoulders ached from doing do much stirring for the last hour and he longed for a break. It didn`t stop him from winking at Daryl who entered the kitchen from the hallway carrying the three smoked turkeys, the smoked pheasant, and the smoked ham. A cigarette dangled from his mouth and he was covered with snow from head to foot. He winked back at Jesus.

       "What the hell happened to you?" Ms. Maitlin asked.

       "Some snow dumped right on top of me from the smokehouse roof," Daryl said.

       "Didn`t cool you off any," Carol said looking from him to Jesus as she took the pheasant and ham. Bertie came over and got the turkeys.

       "At least you got our meat for the feast," Jesus said still staring at him and licking his lips, especially when he said the word 'meat'. It wasn`t lost on Ms. Maitlin that Daryl flirtatiously wiggled his eyebrows at Jesus.

       "Why don`t you two bawdy boyfriends take a break," she said. "Carol, Bertie, and I can do some things by ourselves for a bit."

       Jesus finished stirring the dressing then wiped off his hands before removing his apron. Daryl hung his snow-covered coat on a hook in the hallway. Holding hands they passed Maggie coming into the kitchen.

       "Are your assistants abandoning you?" she asked.

       "They needed a break," Ms. Maitlin replied. "I got tired of them winking and flirting with each other and pinching each other`s asses for the last hour. Otherwise, everything is going smoothly."

       "I`ll lend you a hand for a while," Maggie said shaking her head and laughing as Bertie walked by her with a stack of plates.

       In the foyer Daryl and Jesus slunk by the others and went into the large closet just off of Maggie`s office. It was mostly empty and had a small dim bulb for a light. Daryl knelt down in front of Jesus and undid the fly on his pants. Jesus took a deep breath of anticipation as Daryl took his cock and stroked it and licked the tip. His tongue played up and down, teasing, causing Jesus to lean his head back in ecstasy. He got hard quickly when Daryl took it into his mouth and let it slide deep into his throat. Daryl could taste the pre-cum and swallowed when Jesus came with a burst that felt like it blew out of a cannon. They then switched places and Jesus eagerly undid Daryl`s pants only to find him already semi-hard.

       "Looks like I need to finish the job," Jesus said.

       "Just shut up and get to work."

       "Happy Birthday to me." Jesus licked Daryl`s cock, teasing the tip by sucking on it until he tasted a little bit of semen before sliding it down his throat. He worked it until Daryl shot out his load, then stood up as the two of them embraced feeling their cocks rubbing against each other as they smothered each other with open-mouthed kisses.

       "Oh god, I`ve been wanting that all afternoon," Jesus said.

       "Must be the stress."

       "Ms. Maitlin knows us pretty well."

       Daryl snickered. "I think it was all the winkin` and pinchin`."

       "That too." They hugged for a long time before redoing their pants and pulling themselves together. Jesus opened the door and peered out. No one was nearby so they were able to slip out of the closet unnoticed. Holding hands they went back to the kitchen.

       Carol smiled knowingly at them. "Looks like we`ll have another blizzard by tonight."

       "The wind ain`t the only thing blowin`," Daryl said as he and Jesus eyed each other. He sat down and poured himself a mug of coffee. Jesus put his apron back on. Both of them had slight smiles on their faces.

       "Good lord," Ms. Maitlin said. "Looks like the bawdy boyfriends are having themselves a Merry Christmas alright."

      Carol nearly dropped a casserole she was taking out of the oven she laughed so hard.

                                                                       *****

The food was soon set out and the entire community had gathered in Barrington House crowding in the foyer, Maggie`s office, the library, the parlor, and the main dining room which all opened into the foyer with sets of double doors. At least there was enough room to accommodate the numbers.

      "Father Gabriel, would you do us the honor of a blessing?" Maggie asked after everyone had settled into their places.

      "Of course." Father Gabriel stood up. "Will everyone please join hands with his or her neighbor?" All were silent and joined hands as he bowed his head. "Dear Lord. We gather here today on this glorious day of peace to thank you for the prosperity, warmth, and togetherness of those assembled here. It does not matter if you are called God, Jehovah, Allah, or if there are non-believers at these tables; for we are united as survivors, as friends, as former enemies--as family. We have had many losses, those closest to our hearts will be remembered for their strength and endurance during these times of awkward troubles. We thank you for the food we are about to eat to ensure that we will live to survive another day. Let us move forward in peace and solidarity, and," he looked at Daryl who met his gaze, "continue to forgive those we may think have done wrong to us. Amen."

      There was a chorus of 'amen`s'. 

      "And God bess us everone booze humbugs," Judith said in a small voice.

      There was some laughter, but mostly 'aw`s'. 

      "Who taught her to say that?" Rick asked somewhat alarmed.

      "Uncle Paul and Uncle Daryl," Michonne replied.

      "It was Daryl who tried to teach her to say 'bah humbug'," Jesus said as if he was trying to recuse himself, but Rick`s gaze indicated it wasn`t working.

      Daryl just put some mashed potatoes on his plate as he quickly met Rick`s gaze, then tried to ignore him.

      "So that`s where she picks up that stuff," Rick said and kicked Daryl under the table.

      "Ow," Daryl quietly said rolling his eyes.

      Michonne just held her stomach as she laughed, something she had been needing for a long time.

                                                                       *****

       The dinner had gone well with the food and some of the wine that Gregory had hoarded. By nightfall everyone had gone back to their homes. Daryl and Jesus stumbled into their room both completely plastered. They were both soon under the covers of the bed.

       "I want it in the ass tonight," Jesus said as he slobbered kisses all over Daryl. His voice was breathless as it pressed against Daryl`s ear.

       They rubbed their cocks together to get aroused, when Daryl suddenly paused. "Is it possible to love too much?"

       "Not for anyone who truly loves one another." Jesus turned Daryl`s head to face him. "I`ve never had this depth of a feeling for anyone in my entire life."

       Daryl closed his eyes. "Ya changed a lot of things for me, Paul."

       Jesus stroked Daryl`s hair. "You`ve been through so much shit. I had my own shit but for some reason I was able to find a way to deal with it. Will you allow me to help you with yours?"

       Daryl nodded. Jesus kissed him hard and they resumed their lovemaking as the world outside swirled in a maelstrom of white.

                                                                       *****

The next day dawned with the sun shining high and bright. Both Daryl and Jesus woke up with slight hangovers but their lovemaking during the night had been worth it. After breakfast Jesus helped Ms. Maitlin clean up the kitchen while Daryl took his turn at the sentry post, wearing a pair of dark sunglasses due to the brightness. After washing up some pots and pans, Jesus sat at the table nursing his mug of coffee.

       "You two have a late night last night?" Ms. Maitlin slyly asked.

       "I think I was warm on the inside for the first time in a long time," Jesus said. His mood became serious. "He`s a very sensitive man who`s been through hell even before the world went to shit. His emotions are quite fragile. So far I`ve been able to calm him down where he can manage his anger better. He needs stability if he`s going to stay strong."

       "Unconditional love can do wonders, Paul. Sometimes all a person needs is a shoulder to cry on. In this world as it is now there are a lot of tears." Ms. Maitlin`s expression became sorrowful.

       "Daryl needs to get away from the sadness of the last several months. He doesn`t like losing people even though he knows it`s going to happen. Carl`s death affected him a lot, he doesn`t like to lose children. I don`t, either."

       "I think that`s what triggered his breakdown. When those people threatened to kidnap the children. It will be up to you to stay alive from now on, Paul."

       Jesus smiled slightly. "Yeah, it will." He finished his coffee and got up. "I`m going to take thermoses out to our sentries."

                                                                        *****

       Shapiro was the other sentry on duty at the front gate and was looking through binoculars as he jumped up and down trying to keep warm. Daryl stood on the other post coolly smoking a cigarette. His crossbow was slung across his back and he held the rifle Jesus and Ms. Maitlin had given him. Every so often he would look through the scope only to see the snow-covered landscape, desperately hoping a deer would show up so he could try out the rifle.

       "Aren`t you cold?" Shapiro asked as he now ran in place trying to keep his feet warm.

       "A little. I got wool socks on," Daryl said remembering how he sometimes forgot to put them on unless Paul reminded him. He could be such a mother hen at times, which Daryl found annoying, but tolerated.

       "I don`t know why we`re fool enough to do this. A person would be crazy to come out in this cold and attack us."

       "There are a lot of desperate people out there," Daryl said. "Cold like this will drive them out."

       "So the moral question is do we help them or not," Shapiro said.

       "Depends on if they`re shootin` at us." Daryl noticed Jesus trudging across the snow carrying two thermoses.

       "It`s coffee, but it`s not kosher," Jesus said to Shapiro as he climbed up the ladder to hand him one.

       "Kosher can go to blazes," Shapiro said immediately pouring himself a cup.

       Jesus grinned appreciating the sentiment and went over to the other sentry post. He climbed up and he and Daryl exchanged a quick kiss. "Had a chance to use the rifle yet?"

       "Nah, the deer must know I`m lookin` for 'em."

       "Eduardo is forming a hunting party for tomorrow. He asked me to do survey and wondered if you wanted to join in. Maybe you`ll get the chance then."

       Daryl shrugged. "Sure."

       "Bring in the bacon," Shapiro said.

       "Your religion prevents you from eating that, remember?" Jesus said.

       "Fuck that when you`re hungry. The ham was sure good yesterday. Nabila and Siddiq thought so, too."

       Both Daryl and Jesus laughed at that. Shapiro was one of the few people whose company Daryl actually enjoyed. "How are you feeling this morning?" Jesus asked.

      "Head hurts a litte, but I`m alright." Daryl took a sip of the coffee. "Ms. Maitlin made this. It tastes good."

      "I don`t make good coffee is that what you`re saying?"

      "I didn`t say nothin`. Hers is good strong stuff. Yours is--too watered down."

       Jesus rolled his eyes. "Trying to save on coffee beans. It is the apocalypse or haven`t you heard?"

       "I heard."

       There was a noise coming from the trees in the surrounding woods. Daryl raised his rifle and noticed that three people had emerged from hiding in the trees.

       "Halt!" Shapiro called out aiming his assault rifle at them.

       "Hey, we`re just looking for some food," one of them said.

       "That`s the hippie we found. He`s still alive," another, a woman, said pointing at Jesus.

       Daryl was instantly on the alert as well, aiming the rifle at them. "Are ya the assholes who shot my bike?" he demanded in a loud harsh voice.

       "So that was you. Great for target practice," the first speaker said. All three of them aimed their weapons at Daryl, Jesus, and Shapiro. "Open up the gate or we`ll kill you three right here and now." He aimed his handgun and shot a bullet right past Shapiro`s head.

       "Dammit." Shapiro was about to shoot back when there were three quick shots from behind the three strangers and they all fell down dead with bullet holes through their heads.

       Rick lowered his Colt Python. He was standing in the road just outside the fence. "Sneaked out the back gate when I heard the alarm."

      They let Rick back in and closed the gate. He climbed up on the sentry post to join Daryl and Jesus.

      "Back to the real world," Jesus said.

      "It`s fucked comin` and goin`," Daryl said. He noticed Shapiro was quietly trying to get his attention and pointing to a spot near the trees. A buck had emerged looking for something to eat in the tall grass sticking above the snow.

      "Can you get it from here?" Jesus asked quietly.

      Daryl peered through the scope on the rifle. "Yeah." He unlatched the safety and carefully took aim. Everyone watched with eager anticipation as the buck moved out more into the open. There was a report from the rifle and the deer went down with a wound directly in its heart.

      Rick clapped Daryl on the back then looked at Jesus. "Let`s go get it."

      Shapiro gave Daryl a thumbs up. Daryl returned it with one of his own then dug into his pockets to enjoy a smoke.

                                                                       *****

       Since hauling the deer had been a bloody affair, Jesus hurried into the bathroom to take a hot shower, afterwards going over to the sofa to relax and read  **The Complete Sherlock Holmes** by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, the book Rick, Michonne, and Judith had given to him as a Christmas gift. That`s when he saw something on the antique chest of drawers with a note next to it. It was the Christmas cactus he had seen in the greenhouse. He picked up the note and read:  _Paul, I ain`t one for presents, but here`s one for ya.~~D_. He looked up and smiled. Daryl must have gotten it from the greenhouse before going on sentry duty.

       Jesus closed his eyes and the image of Daryl Dixon slowly came into focus as he held his hand over his heart and sighed. Maggie had been right about getting close to someone. A sense of peace rushed over him as he looked around the room admiring the furnishings, the fireplace, and the bed. He smiled and kissed the note. "Welcome home."

 

                                                ***          *         8          *          ***

       

      

      

       

       

        

       

        
      

       

     

       

       

      

        

        

       

       

       

        

      

        

        

        

        

        

 

        

       

     

        

 

      

       

       

        

       

           

      

      

       

        

 

       

       

       

       

        

 

        

        

      

       

        

       

        

        

 

        

       

       

 

       


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